• Chava didn’t understand what was happening. Her mother told her that they were coming to move them somewhere. She didn’t know what to do. Her family had been separated and now she was alone in a train wagon full of people she didn’t know. It stunk of piss and sweat. Somewhere a baby was crying. Chavaleh was scared and wished she could find her sister. Hannah was only 9, and must be all alone and terrified. The train had been going on for hours and hours. Chava wondered where she was headed and what was in store for her. Suddenly, the train stopped. Out of a hole in the wooden wall, she saw a high wire gate under a gray sky. The buildings behind the wire looked dark and sinister. There were figures in the mist that were moving slowly form one building to another.
    The very air was saturated with the stench of rotting corpses. After a while, a tall German soldier opened the train car’s door. He started pulling people out and throwing them on the floor. Before Chava knew what was happening, she fell and opened her eyes to see gravel at the tip of her nose. All she heard around her were the cries and screams of the other women mixed with the pounding of her own heart. As she got up, there were gunshots off in the distance. More German soldiers arrived and ordered all the women into a line. They marched them through an iron gate which clanged behind them. As Chava entered, she looked around; the bleak emptiness of the camp filled her with a cold feeling and dread. There was a soldier going down the line of people and ripping their clothes off. When it was Chava’s turn, she shrunk away from the man, but ended up naked with her ripped and soiled clothes in a bundle by her feet. As she stared at her feet, embarrassed of being naked in public, somebody pushed her from behind and she fell into the mud. Chava laid there and cried. What was happening? Why me, why us? What did I do to deserve this?
    She got up and went into a tin shack with the rest of the women. Cold water poured out of showers in the ceiling and landed in dirty puddles on the floor. The women around her shivered as they looked for a familiar face. Slowly, they filed out of the building. When they reached the door, soldiers gave them old gray dresses to put on. Chava’s dress was huge on her and stunk like rotten wood. Then the Germans made all of them stand together. A general, she assumed, started to yell harshly in German. Nobody understood anything, then an old lady explained what he had said. At the camp, they would work and have only one meal a day. Anybody who tried to escape would be executed. Somebody from the back of the group asked why they were there. The old lady replied that they would live there until it was their time.
    The Nazis separated them into groups and herded them into small tin shacks. There was no furniture, only a little bit of damp hay strewn around the floor. The small room was way too crowded with all the women and girls. Somewhere, a baby cried. There was the sound of somebody locking the door from the outside. Slowly, people began laying down and attempting to sleep. After what seemed like hours, Chava decided to lay down and she slowly fell asleep to the sound of women crying.

    A trumpet blared loudly through the whole camp. Chava woke up and noticed that the sun hadn’t risen yet. A soldier stood at the door watching them file out. Chava was one of the last ones out. She glanced back and saw that an old woman had yet to get up. She went over and shook her cold, stiff shoulder. Then, she realized that the woman was dead. Something in German was shouted at her, so she got up and walked out, leaving the first victim of her group behind her.
    All the women stood in a line as if waiting for something. At the front there was a man holding a strange object in his hands. As Chava got closer, she observed as the man imprinted a series of numbers on the people’s left inner forearms. When it was her turn, she looked away as she felt the needle pierce her arm. When it was done, Chava looked down and saw her number tattooed in her flesh: J394162… the numbers she would carry with her until the very end. The next man shaved her head. She couldn’t cry any longer. Not one tear came to her as she looked at all the locks of hair strewn about the floor. The women’s faces were no longer recognizable, all of them had the same blank look of despair on their faces. The girl next to Chava sung a prayer song under her breath. In silence, she hoped, as did everyone else, that God would help them; that God would save them.

    The rest of the day, the Nazis made them work by carrying rocks, carrying wood for fire, digging holes and washing dishes. The stench that was overly present in the camp was unbearable. There were some people at the camp that looked as if they had been working there for a long time. Their clothes were torn and ripped, their hair had begun to grow long and there were ugly scars all over their arms and legs. The poor women were so thin, they looked as if they could be blown away with the slightest breeze. Their faces were empty of all emotion; they showed no pain, fear or even hope. At around midday they were served the only meal of the day, which consisted of a tasteless broth and stale bread. Many people couldn’t stomach it and threw up. Chava lost her appetite and gave up her meal to a girl about 5 or 6 years old. The girl ate the food up quickly and gave Chava a small smile. She was so miserable that she couldn’t bring herself to return the smile.
    Long weary days past. Chava became so hungry that even after the meal her stomach continued to grumble. The sound of screams and gunshots often punctured the abysmal silence of the camp. Soldiers carried the dead bodies and dumped them into a huge pit behind the shacks. From time to time they would burn them and a cloud of gray smoke would blanket the camp for hours. Chava also saw many people go into a building with no windows and be brought out dead; but it was a mystery to her as what happened inside. Rumors floated around the camp trying to give a reason for why they were there. Some people said it was for their benefit, others said it was because of some disease, and others said it was extermination. Chava didn’t know what to believe, but all the people in the camp were either Jewish, homosexual, or of some other religious group that she couldn’t recognize. Each had their own versions of the happenings, their own ways of praying to God.
    One day, Chava was carrying rocks to a mound far across the camp. The task was useless, and she became tired after a few trips. Once she started to slow down, and a soldier came over and started pushing her and shouting. Chava speeded up and kept a steady pace, but the weight and exhaustion slowed her down after a while. She watched the Nazi get closer and heard his angry words, but she couldn’t go on. She tumbled and suddenly felt a sharp pain spread across her back. More pain, this time on her arm. As Chava stared at the flaming red welts on her arm, something snapped. She got up and ran; between buildings, around poles. The soldiers started a pursuit. Angry shouts and gunshots were all over the camp. As she ran, Chava looked over her shoulder… and suddenly, she fell into a pit. At first, she was in shock; then she opened her eyes and was forced to close them. She couldn’t believe it… Chava felt a deep hole being plunged into her heart. She finally worked up the courage to open her eyes and look at the cold, stiff corpse beneath her. The little girl was covered in dry blood from the many bullet-holes all over her body and she didn’t have any hair. But there was no mistaking that face. Chava stared into her sister’s big, blue, lifeless eyes and felt her soul break. The starlight was reflected in Hannah’s eyes and said a silent prayer and hoped desperately that her little sister was in a better place. Then she wept. Chava cried for hours and hours laying out in the moonlight on the mound of dead bodies. Why? Why were WE the chosen people?
    “Do not cry, fraülein,” said a man’s voice from above her. Chava looked up slowly. “The dead are dead and there is nothing you can do about it.” The man held down his hand to help her out. She hesitated, should I trust him? Anyways, she needed to get out of the pit. Chava took his hand and allowed herself to be helped. He gently sat her down against the nearest building. The man took a handkerchief out of his pocket and began to wipe away her tears. Finally, Chava gathered the courage to ask, “Why are you doing this?” He looked at her and said, “Is it a crime to want to help people?” Chava lowered her gaze. “No.”
    “Well, I want to help people.”
    “Why me?”
    “Because you look like you could use some.”
    Then he saw the wounds on her arms and got up and walked away. Chava didn’t know what to do. Should she trust him? He was a German soldier, but somehow different. Footsteps came around the corner. He was back with a First Aid Medical kit. He gently began to clean and bandage her wounds. She wondered aloud, “What is your name?” He laughed. “Are questions the only thing you know how to say?” Chava became embarrassed. “My name is Frederich. What is yours?” “Chava.”
    Frederich got up. “Well it was nice meeting you, but you have to get back to your block. Be careful.” Then he turned around and started to walk away. “Thank You.” Chava said and he paused for a moment, and then continued.



    The next few days went by as always. It was comforting to Chava to see a friendly face around the camp once in a while. She wanted to know more about this man; why was he different? But she didn’t have time to think about Frederich. The soldiers were picking people to “terminate” more and more often. If you didn’t work hard, they picked you; if you had too many friends, caused too much trouble, or simply looked suspicious they picked you.
    One day, while Chava was washing dishes, Frederich came running into the kitchen. “Run, run! They’re coming! Hide!!!” he shouted at her. She didn’t understand what was happening. “What’s wrong?” He pulled her outside and started to run. Chava ran after him even though she didn’t understand the reason why. “Why are we running? Where are we going?” she kept asking. Frederich told her to be quiet as he took her to the laundry shack and went in. She followed him and let him hide her underneath a pile of dirty rags. As he helped her hide, Frederich explained to her what was happening.
    “They’re picking again.”
    “Oh. I haven’t done anything, why do I have to hide?.”
    “The thing is, you people have become smarter and haven’t given them a reason for your picking. They must keep exterminating….”
    “Oh. I understand.”
    They stayed quiet as footsteps walked past and voices shouted. After a while, Chava came out of the pile. Frederich was sitting on an upturned bucket. She looked for a place to sit and ended up on the floor. For the first time, Chava looked Frederich in the eye.
    “Why me?”
    “Why you what?”
    “Why did you choose to help me out of all the people in this place?”
    “Because I see you here, and I wonder how it would be to be in your place. I would want somebody to help me. There is no reason for the cruelty here. You shouldn’t have to suffer. Besides, I never wanted to come here. My parents forced me. I do not approve of Herr Hitler’s ideas.”
    Chava blinked. “Your parents? How old are you?”
    “Nineteen. You?”
    “Sixteen.”
    Chava’s stomach grumbled loudly. Frederich laughed and said, “Stay here.” He left and she wondered about him. Where did he come from? Why was he here? Frederich seemed to have a good heart, good intentions, so she decided to trust him. As she sat there, waiting, she heard gunshots sound from across the camp. Suddenly, she realized that she did not want to die. Chava wanted the war to end and to be free once again.

    Frederich returned half an hour later bringing biscuits, cheese, and an apple. She devoured these fast and marveled on how good everything tasted and felt. After Chava ate, Frederich asked her to tell him about her life. She told him about her mother, father, sister, and their farm. She also told him how she was captured and separated from her family. He was very understanding and told her about his own family. His parents were members of the Nazi party and supported Hitler. He was a calm, passive person and did not think that which was going on was morally right, so his parents sent him to serve him to in the army. For hours, they talked about their family until nighttime arrived. Frederich helped Chava sneak back to her shack. She desperately hoped that at last, she had finally found a friend.

    The next week passed. Everyday, Chava hoped to see Frederich, but she only caught glimpses of him across the camp. Chava found herself wanting to know more and more about him. She wanted to hear his voice, feel his presence. The attraction she felt for him grew increasingly everyday. Finally, one rainy morning, he appeared while she was washing dishes and pots. “Hello, Chava,” he whispered in her ear. She was startled to hear his voice. She turned around and smiled nervously.
    “Shalom, Frederich…” He cut her off.
    “Please don’t call me that. It sounds too formal.” Chava didn’t know want to say. “I brought you some cheese,” he explained as he stuffed a greasy package into her hands.
    “Oh, thank you. How have you been?”
    “Fine… well, not so fine.”
    “Why ‘not so fine’?”
    “I don’t really want to be here or do the things that I’m doing.”
    “You don’t have to.”
    Frederich blinked. “What?”
    “You can escape! Go somewhere else! Anywhere but here!”
    “That’s hard considering we have a 24-hour guard AND we’re in the middle of nowhere.”
    “Oh. True.”
    Frederich sat down on a box and invited Chava to sit next to him. She hesitated a moment, then accepted. “Tell me how you’ve been,” he said.
    “I hate being here. Stupid work for no reason and I’m always hungry.”
    “That’s why I brought you the cheese, you know.”
    She looked down at the forgotten packet on her lap. “When will this war be over?” she asked, beginning to eat.
    Frederich leaned back and sighed deeply.
    “I don’t know.”
    “Oh. Then whose winning?”
    “I don’t know that either.”
    “Hmmmm?” was all Chava managed to get out of her mouth, which was full with cheese.
    “Well, we, I mean the Nazis, have control of most of Western Europe. But there are rumors of the Allied army about to invade.”
    “I hope they come and save us…”
    “Me too.”
    Chava looked up and saw Frederich’s serious face and decided to change to the subject.

    “Is it true all Germans have blonde hair and blue eyes like you?”
    Frederich laughed. “Some of them do.”
    “Oh, that’s what my father used to tell me.”
    “Really? I wonder where he got that idea.”
    Chava shrugged, “I don’t know.”
    “Do you like blonde hair and blue eyes?”
    She felt her face become warm and realized that she must have been blushing. “I think so.” He laughed. Chava felt embarrassed and got up to continue washing the remaining dishes. Frederich must have thought that she was mad at him for laughing and said, “I’m sorry!”
    She turned around and was about to say something when she tripped. He caught her in his arms just as she was falling. Chava opened her eyes. Her cheek was against his solid chest and he smelled of cheap soap and sweat. For some strange reason, she liked the smell and felt as if she never wanted to leave those arms. She looked up at him and for a brief moment, their lips met. The kiss broke and Frederich stammered. “I… um… well….” It was his turn to be embarrassed. Chava didn’t know what to do. He finally managed to say, “Um, I gotta go.” She watched him walk out the door, not knowing what to think.

    They passed each other frequently around the camp, but they never stopped to talk. Chava finally accepted the desires that she felt towards Frederich. Every night she fell asleep with the memory of his arms around her. Her body longed for his presence. The next few days she looked and wanted to talk to him, but he was always too far away or too busy. Chava became more and more depressed and apart from this, the workload was getting harder, longer since the prisoners stopped arriving. Rumors of the American invasion were getting stronger, closer. She desperately hoped that they would come and save them. The Nazis were not happy at all; they started picking people more and more often and in larger quantities.

    One morning, she was awoken by shouting and gunshots. Chava desperately hoped that it was the Americans that had come to save them. She ran outside and immediately wished that she hadn’t. It was ultimate chaos in the camp; the Germans were grabbing prisoners and those who resisted were killed instantly. It wasn’t long before a soldier spotted her and attempted to drag her away. Chava gave a few well-placed kicks and began to run as fast as she could. She needed to get out. Chava didn’t want to die. She couldn’t, not now. Not like this. Somebody grabbed her from behind and she began to scream right away.
    “Shhh,” came from a voice near her ear. Chava turned around and was relieved to find Frederich’s blue eyes staring into her own. One peaceful moment in a world full of panic. That second disappeared as fast as it had arrived. The screams became painfully loud in her ears as he rushed her through the camp. Chava’s sweaty hand was in his as he led her into a small cabin at the edge of the camp. She looked around what she assumed to be a hospital, because there were several beds and medical kits in the room. Frederich turned around to face her. He saw a face full of fear, sadness; the face of someone who had lost all hope. Tears began to flood down Chava’s face as he brought her up into his arms. An eternity seemed to have passed as they stood there, embracing one another.

    “Why?”
    “Because you are different and people fear what they do not understand.”
    She turned her head up to stare into Frederich’s face. So close. Chava’s lips longed for his kiss, the kiss that made everything seem better. They could feel each others’ breath as they were drawn together. .. Footsteps. They came apart quickly and Frederich told Chava to hide underneath a bed. She peered out of her hiding place as Frederich opened the door and greeted the soldiers. Minutes went by of listening to them speak in German and a few forced laughs from Frederich. Finally, once they had left, Chava came out from underneath and sat on the bed. Frederich did not look happy. “Tell me what’s happening.” Her question answered by silence.
    “Freddy, please…”
    Frederich took a deep sigh. “We’ve gotten orders from Herr Hitler to exterminate all the prisoners by tomorrow. The Allied forces have invaded.”
    A glimmer of hope began to warm up Chava’s heart.
    “We can escape! We’ll get out and the English or Americans can help us! Then we can go somewhere where we can forget all this… and be happy! Truly happy.”
    Frederich smiled, “Yes, we must. Tomorrow morning, we’ll leave, just after inspection.”
    “Tomorrow morning? Why not now?”
    “Because if I’m not here for final inspection, they’ll know that we left and come looking for us. In the confusion we can slip away without being noticed.”
    “Oh.”
    An awkward silence hung over them for a few moments; then frederich got up.
    “I’ll be back soon,” he said, then walked away out the door.

    Chava felt happy, happier than what she had felt for a long time. She laid down on one of the beds. It was so soft and she immediately began to feel drowsy. As she lay there she suddenly realized something: what if after they had escaped Frederich didn’t want to be with her anymore? Chava tried to push it out her mind as she fell asleep.

    She awoke to find Frederich softly stroking her cheek. Chava immediately jumped out of bed. “Freddy, can I ask you something?”
    “Sure, what’s the matter?”
    “Are you going to leave me after we escape?”
    He stared into her eyes. “I could never do that.”
    Frederich pulled Chava into his arms, “I love you.”

    She was totally unprepared for that; she didn’t know what to say. But she didn’t have to think for long, because their lips came together in a kiss. His lips seemed to warm her from head to toe. Chava’s mind went totally blank as the kiss became more passionate and she gave herself totally up to it. I love you, that’s what he said…

    She ran from an unseen evil that pursued her through every turn, every door, all the distance. Screams echoed through the darkness that seemed to go on forever. Chava began to fall. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t scream. Nothingness engulfed her as she desperately tried to escape. Angry shouts became louder. What she thought was part of her nightmare suddenly became very real. She opened her eyes. Screaming, gunshots, angry shouts from all around her. Chava began to scream as cold hands, ripped their bodies apart. Soldiers violently dragged her from the bed. In her desperation, she saw that they were doing the same to Frederich. They dragged her naked body outside, through the mud and blood all through the camp. The soldiers threw her against a wall where other women were lined up.

    Cries of desperation, screaming, filled the whole camp. Help, Chava thought, somebody help me. She looked up to see a general beating Frederich. Tears sprung out of her eyes. They were supposed to escape. They were going to be happy. Soldiers pulled him roughly to his feet and shoved a rifle into his hands. The general laughed a cold, merciless laugh. He pointed at Chava and said, “Shoot her.”
    Frederich threw the rifle down at the general’s feet. “No.”
    “Shoot her or you’re as bad as them.”
    “No.”
    The general grinned. “Then you shall die as one of them.”
    “So be it.”
    Before she knew it, he was struck to the floor, blood gushing out of his mouth. Why? God save us! Please help us! The soldiers dragged Frederich and threw him next to her. God, why have you abandoned us? Chava pulled Frederich up and held him close.
    “I love you,” she told him; she had to say it.
    He kissed her. “I love you too.”

    The guns were fired. The last thing Chava saw was a single tear gently rolling down Frederich’s cheek. I love you…








    The End





    To my dear grandfather, who bravely helped those who needed to be saved.