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I breathed my first breath. It was cold compared to the warmth I had left behind. I cried, my mother screamed "Monster! It's a monster!" and I fell silent, staring into eyes filled with fear, hate, confusion, my mothers eyes. She began to weep and held me close. She apologised, said that despite my hideous form she still loved me. What was wrong with my form? There was a knock at the door. Then everything turned to darkness. When it was light again, only my mother was there. She spoke to me softly whilst she fed me.
"I'm sorry... I'm really sorry. Nobody can know of your existence. I don't know what'd happen to me... to you, if anyone where to find out. You're going to have to be very quiet." Her voice shook as she spoke and I could sense her fear. But I was too young to know why she need be so afraid. Nonetheless, I stayed quiet, for her sake. Whenever there was a knock on the door and someone called her name, Mahna, I was returned to the darkness where I silently waited for the light to return, and for the next six years, that was my life. It wasn't much, but I was content, I only needed my mother and I'm sure, she only needed me. But that all changed...
- by xoxkenny93xox |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 01/10/2009 |
- Skip
- Title: kai's beginning
- Artist: xoxkenny93xox
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Description:
this is the beggining of a story i'm writing (no duh :P)
plz tell me if it's alright and if not, where i can improve
thnx
xx - Date: 01/10/2009
- Tags: kais beginning
- Report Post
Comments (4 Comments)
- Sweet kiren - 12/11/2009
- It's awsome. I say keep going biggrin
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- xtinkkx - 04/10/2009
- huh.I kinda like it. the very beginning was kinda confusing and sketchy but its fine. Spelling and Grammer needs to be improved but only a tiny bit. Great story otherwise.
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- Arienne Keith - 01/16/2009
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MORE!!! biggrin
I'm a little new to gaia so I'm not sure how to look for a link to the next one.... - Report As Spam
- asukakitty22 - 01/15/2009
- OH! I like it! I do hope tht you will add some details of those 6 years somewhere in your upcoming chapter... like flashbacks or something... AWESOME! ^.^
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