- I try to say the right things but nothing comes out i try my best to make you smile but the world goes and makes you frown again i need you i want you but i can't touch or have. My heart sinks deeper into sorrow the futher you get from me the futher things begin to fall apart. Wishing i was your super glue wishing i was your crutch that you love that your heart beated for like mine beats for you but it can;t can it since you only see me as a friend.
- by HollowLink |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 08/02/2008 |
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- Title: Only you
- Artist: HollowLink
- Description: A poem i wrote while thinking of one of my friends
- Date: 08/02/2008
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Comments (5 Comments)
- Hug Dealer - 10/09/2010
- Terrible punctuation and capitalization. Learn to write first, and then post poetry. Also, when writing poetry, be sure to put it in the correct format. Other than that, it was a decent poem. 2/5
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- justamanda325 - 05/01/2009
- maybe the friend thinks the same of you........you never know
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- He Has No First Name - 01/05/2009
- If it's a poem, then put it in such form. This is just a block of text. Also, you need general grammer (puncutaion, capalization, ect) to tell where on thought stops and the begins. It's also very cliche and bland. I would greatly suggest using the OP/L stickes then revise, repost, and I'll give a better crit. Good luck.
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- xXForeverMusicLoverXx - 12/18/2008
- This is cute.. And I Love it!!!
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- Mikimi-San - 12/13/2008
- Nice. I Like it. 5/5
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