• For the guys:

    Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you.
    But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the bowl’s empty & so is your head.

    After you, my love, my only prize
    Would be a bullet between the eyes.

    Of loving beauty you float with grace
    If only you could hide your face.

    Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
    This describes everything you’re not.

    I want to feel your sweet embrace
    But don’t take that paper bag off your face.

    I love your smile, your face, and your eyes …
    Damn, I’m good at telling lies!

    Every time I see your face
    I wish I were in outer space.

    My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
    Marrying you screwed up my life.

    Beauty is on the inside, but some may doubt,
    If its true, I’d prefer you inside out.

    I see your face when I am dreaming
    That’s why I always wake up screaming.

    My feelings for you no words can tell
    Except for maybe “go to hell.”

    For the ladies:

    I thought that I could love no other
    Until, that is, I met your brother.

    What inspired this amorous rhyme?
    Two parts vodka, one part lime.

    I saw your face as you walked by
    But then I saw a better guy.

    My love you take my breath away
    What have you stepped in to smell this way?