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Posted: Sat May 15, 2010 10:22 pm
Granted. It's filled with arsenic.
I wish I had demonic powers.
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Posted: Sat May 15, 2010 11:01 pm
Granted, but they were stripped away from you and now you're still a vampire.
I wish I had a dance partner.
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Posted: Sat May 15, 2010 11:04 pm
Granted, but he's a dead dance partner.
I wish I had mail.
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Posted: Sun May 16, 2010 11:12 pm
Granted. It's a letter bomb.
I wish I had powered armor, like in those sci-fi films.
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Posted: Sun May 16, 2010 11:46 pm
Granted, but it backfires and hurts you instead.
I wish my term papers would write themselves.
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Posted: Mon May 17, 2010 5:57 pm
Granted, but your papers can't spell well.
I wish I had a pair of angel wings.
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Posted: Mon May 17, 2010 6:13 pm
Granted but then they're taken away and now you're stuck without them.
I wish I were a vampire.
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Posted: Mon May 17, 2010 6:17 pm
Granted, but you die because you accidentally bit yourself.
I wish I incest with onee-chan. ninja
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Posted: Tue May 18, 2010 9:23 pm
Granted. You got AIDS and mentally retarded children.
I wish I could mass an army that does not abandon me and is loyal to the end that will help me take over the world.
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Posted: Wed May 19, 2010 10:29 am
Granted but they're an army of harmless hamsters.
I wish I had a Klondike bar
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Posted: Wed May 19, 2010 5:34 pm
Granted, but in order to receive it you had to prove 'what you would do for a Klondike Bar' by stabbing your best friend and sawing your own legs off.
I wish the hamsters in my military were vicious but did not attack me or anyone I love or anyone who works for me.
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Posted: Wed May 19, 2010 5:42 pm
Granted, but being a Cat, I gave in to my nature and ate two, causing the rest scamper off.
I wish I believed in wishing wells.
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Posted: Wed May 19, 2010 5:51 pm
Granted. Still doesn't prove their existence.
I wish I had a dictator hat. Military style.
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Posted: Thu May 20, 2010 12:02 am
granted but its crafted of dried cow s**t
I wish I had a skeleton mask
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Posted: Thu May 20, 2010 8:59 am
Granted, but it is also made from dried cow s**t. The makers had some left over after making the military dictator hat.
I wish I ruled my own country.
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