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 Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 9:04 am
Granted, but no one goes to you for anything.
I wish I had a ton of money.
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Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 8:58 pm
Granted. It all got stolen.
I wish my wish wasn't corruptable.
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Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 9:38 pm
Granted, but your wish never existed.
I wish pubic hair never existed.
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 11:36 pm
Granted, but now people's crotches are slightly colder.
I wish I wasn't a hypochondriac.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2012 4:38 pm
Granted, but then you become a germaphobe.
I wish for fake cupcakes!
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2012 8:08 pm
Granted, the plastic it was made from contain dangerous amounts of lead.
I wish I was able to slow down time at a whim.
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 7:36 am
Granted, but you slowed down too.
I wish I had a duck!
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2012 10:56 pm
Granted. It frequently pecks your face.
I wish university would end quicker.
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Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2012 6:29 am
Granted, but it ended with you in it.
I wish I married a fish.
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Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 12:04 am
Granted, but you were both caught in a fisherman's net and eating at ritzy seafood joint.
I wish I could actually afford this outfit in real life.
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Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 1:34 pm
Granted. It was just enough money and now you're bankrupt.
I wish I could understand and speak every language in the world.
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Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 1:39 pm
Granted, but the vast amount of spacial memory made you forget everything else you learned in grade school.
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Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 2:45 pm
I wish I climbed into bed.
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Posted: Wed Oct 31, 2012 9:35 am
Granted. Your bed is a bed of nails.
I wish for more ham
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Posted: Wed Oct 31, 2012 10:25 pm
Granted. You get Boris' 'pressed ham'.
I wish I had a cool looking uniform.
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