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 Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:31 am
The other day I stood with my friend on a bus stop, we were hanging out with his girlfriend and some of her freinds prior to coming to the bus stop and had missed the bus we wanted to catch, as we waited I noticed that my friend had taken to gawking at a girl standing on the other end, much to my surprise he walked right over and started hitting on her, not ten minutes before he said "love you forever" to his girlfriend.
No jumping the gun, now I get to my topic, upon bringing up my concern for the safety of his relationship (not to mention his safety in general) he laughed and explained that he and his girlfriend do not consider that cheating.
In all of this my curiosity is just going to kill me, is there different kinds of cheating? does everyone see it different? I have always figured that any form of even near intimate reaction with someone other than your significant one was cheating, and figured that was pretty much the solid rule.
What do you guys consider cheating and not cheating?
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Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 8:12 am
technically, cheating is when something is done behind the others back. there are people who have 'open relationships' where it's known that the other dates other people and they're ok with it. even so, there are rules that are followed so that the 2 in the primary relationship dont end up feeling slighted, or less special than they should feel.
but regardless of what kind of relationship your friend has with his gf, what he did seems to me to be more disrespectful of his gf than anything else. on the outside, she might not have made a fuss about it, but on the inside it probably hurt a bit.
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Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 3:23 pm
Calypsophia technically, cheating is when something is done behind the others back. there are people who have 'open relationships' where it's known that the other dates other people and they're ok with it. even so, there are rules that are followed so that the 2 in the primary relationship dont end up feeling slighted, or less special than they should feel. but regardless of what kind of relationship your friend has with his gf, what he did seems to me to be more disrespectful of his gf than anything else. on the outside, she might not have made a fuss about it, but on the inside it probably hurt a bit. Well, to be frank, he was never all that good with women, found out today the girl at the bus stop didn't give him her number, she gave him her boyfriends number, so he got yelled at. My friend and his girlfriend argued a bit, he told her the whole thing the next time they got together. Smart of him too, he was pondering saying it over the phone, but decided to do it in person. I found out from my friends girlfriend that they do have a guideline, which in his case would have been introducing this new girl to her, Sorta like asking permission, I found it interesting, sorta like swingers.
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:31 am
newtypephynix Calypsophia technically, cheating is when something is done behind the others back. there are people who have 'open relationships' where it's known that the other dates other people and they're ok with it. even so, there are rules that are followed so that the 2 in the primary relationship dont end up feeling slighted, or less special than they should feel. but regardless of what kind of relationship your friend has with his gf, what he did seems to me to be more disrespectful of his gf than anything else. on the outside, she might not have made a fuss about it, but on the inside it probably hurt a bit. Well, to be frank, he was never all that good with women, found out today the girl at the bus stop didn't give him her number, she gave him her boyfriends number, so he got yelled at. My friend and his girlfriend argued a bit, he told her the whole thing the next time they got together. Smart of him too, he was pondering saying it over the phone, but decided to do it in person. I found out from my friends girlfriend that they do have a guideline, which in his case would have been introducing this new girl to her, Sorta like asking permission, I found it interesting, sorta like swingers. yeah kinda.. or some kind of open relationship. I been there, done that. it's not for me, and I'll never EVER do it again. the possible consequences just arent worth it.
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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:10 pm
Any one definition of anything, let alone cheating, is completely based on a person's perception.
While I completely agree with you that was an unwise move on your friends' part, I must ask if his girlfriend witnessed this. If she did not, you should tell her, because your friend might have made the claim that "they don't consider it cheating" to save himself.
In today's society, what you dsecribed is not "cheating," but is still incredibly untrustworthy and deceitful. Your friend was obviously lying when he said he "loved his girlfriend forever" and then walked up to another girl and began making moves on her.
My best advice is to tell the girlfriend if she does not already know, and if she doesn't seem upset by it, you cna only let it go. And I sincerely hope that you don't take his example to heart - I don't know who this girl is, but I know that most women/girls do care if their partners start flirting with someone random.
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 8:54 am
I find most "open relationship" a big scam. Most boys who said to me they want it couldn't really deal to see me dating some other guy.
Most guys who wants these stuff just want you to tell them they can hit on other girls, they want to live in an arab world and merry 7 wifes, i mean little slaves...
You should try to hit on his girlfriend, and see how opened minded he is...
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 9:17 am
relationship style cheating is defined as this:
unloyalty to thwe one you love
but there are LEVELS
there's level one - flirting
level two - dating
level three - intimate dating
level four - physical dating
level five -meaningful physcial dating
apparently your firned doesnt consider level one to be severe enough
advice:
confront the your pal's GF, ask her what she thinks about it, but dont directy say it was your friend that did it to her and this other girl, depending upon reaction, then your answer is clear
there's three reactions:
1 - she'd believe it could happen - and she thinks of it as cheating
2 - same as bove but she denies her BF would do it - this may not come up if you follow my advice
3 - she doesnt see ti as cheating - if this be the response, then let it go and let them sort it out on their own
and should she think of it as cheating - let know know it happened
but isee is as minor but severe cheating
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Posted: Sat Feb 02, 2008 12:30 pm
diffrent ppl have diffrent guidlines tat they want their bf or gf to follow. it depends on the ppl if his gf was fine with it then there is no problem same with every realtionship. some ppl have stricter guidlines then others. so it just depends on wat is okay with them and wat isnt.
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Lunar_Sunset
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Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:48 pm
If you ask me it's not cheating. I mean I would get mad at my bf if he did that to me but I wouldn't consider that cheating. Cheating to me is:
Kissing other girl
Holding Hands with other girl
making out with other girl
telling other girl you love her (more than friend)
Physical things with other girl,
things like that.
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