Hi, lovely people of Gaia. (:
So... here's my rant. I'm almost sixteen, a Junior in high school. I've never dated before until recently. I met this guy briefly during the last few days of school, because my friends told me that we had everything possible in common. (That is to say, we're both nerds, Harry Potter dorks, laugh at math jokes, etc.) After that, we became friends on Facebook and talked on there all summer. My friends kept telling me we should date, but I'm fifteen and that just seemed strange. I found out in early August that he was trying to meet me in person again by getting a group of people to go to the movies & asked someone to invite me to a birthday party, but I was busy both times. I still really, really wanted to see him, and even before I knew that he had organized both outings, I started feeling bad because it probably looked to him like I wasn't interesting and never got out of the house, and I did so want to get to know him better. Once I found out that he really liked me, I was shocked, because that just doesn't happen to me, and within a few days of finding out became very interested in him as well. I scheduled a day for him and a few of my friends to go to the movies the last week of summer. The third day of school, he asked me out, and I quickly said yes.
We dated for three months. We got along really, really well, have a million inside jokes, and I like him more than I've liked any friend. But I just wasn't sure what I was feeling, and I would be in tears at least once a week because I just have no idea what I was feeling toward him. Maybe it's because I've never been in a relationship before, maybe it's because I'm not really attracted to him, maybe I'm just afraid of being heart-broken and I can't emotionally invest myself? We never kissed because of that uncertainty, but we held hands and hung out every weekend. I like him a lot, but because I'm so confused about my own emotions, I broke up with him three days ago because I don't want to lead him on. I had no idea how much he liked me, and now he's devastated and not acting at all like himself, and I'm trying to repair the situation and I want to be friends but he said it'll never be good enough. And it's tearing me apart.
I told him I need time to think about us, and maybe once I mature a bit we'll be able to come back to a relationship, but no promises. He says he'll wait, but he hasn't been the same since, and I hate knowing that I'm the one who did this to him.
Could I please get some sort of advice? What does this sound like to you? Ask me anything; I can't figure out my emotions by myself for some reason, and any help would be much appreciated.
So... here's my rant. I'm almost sixteen, a Junior in high school. I've never dated before until recently. I met this guy briefly during the last few days of school, because my friends told me that we had everything possible in common. (That is to say, we're both nerds, Harry Potter dorks, laugh at math jokes, etc.) After that, we became friends on Facebook and talked on there all summer. My friends kept telling me we should date, but I'm fifteen and that just seemed strange. I found out in early August that he was trying to meet me in person again by getting a group of people to go to the movies & asked someone to invite me to a birthday party, but I was busy both times. I still really, really wanted to see him, and even before I knew that he had organized both outings, I started feeling bad because it probably looked to him like I wasn't interesting and never got out of the house, and I did so want to get to know him better. Once I found out that he really liked me, I was shocked, because that just doesn't happen to me, and within a few days of finding out became very interested in him as well. I scheduled a day for him and a few of my friends to go to the movies the last week of summer. The third day of school, he asked me out, and I quickly said yes.
We dated for three months. We got along really, really well, have a million inside jokes, and I like him more than I've liked any friend. But I just wasn't sure what I was feeling, and I would be in tears at least once a week because I just have no idea what I was feeling toward him. Maybe it's because I've never been in a relationship before, maybe it's because I'm not really attracted to him, maybe I'm just afraid of being heart-broken and I can't emotionally invest myself? We never kissed because of that uncertainty, but we held hands and hung out every weekend. I like him a lot, but because I'm so confused about my own emotions, I broke up with him three days ago because I don't want to lead him on. I had no idea how much he liked me, and now he's devastated and not acting at all like himself, and I'm trying to repair the situation and I want to be friends but he said it'll never be good enough. And it's tearing me apart.
I told him I need time to think about us, and maybe once I mature a bit we'll be able to come back to a relationship, but no promises. He says he'll wait, but he hasn't been the same since, and I hate knowing that I'm the one who did this to him.
Could I please get some sort of advice? What does this sound like to you? Ask me anything; I can't figure out my emotions by myself for some reason, and any help would be much appreciated.
