A bit of non-rhyming poetic...ness

[oh it is ON]

(Here is a late-night attempt to get some feelings down on paper a while ago... thought I'd toss it up and see what kind of response it gets. Constructive criticism is appreciated; I'm not much of a poet, so try not to tear into me too badly smile )

“The Way You Are”
Jonathan Bellerive

I find myself in a state of conflict
Vacillating between feelings of loathing and desire
Whenever I think of you

Everything about you makes me think twice
How you tell me to believe what you say
But you don’t want me to see what you do

It’s how you can drop the right line every time
It’s why I hate you and love you so much
It’s why I’ll always fall for you, over and over again

Why are you like this,
Tormenting me so wonderfully,
Making me beg for agony?

It’s how you are
How you always will be
Why I’ll always fall for you, over and over again  

[Miranti]

I really like this poem  

[nakedDoll Parts]

antonio_guapisimo

(Here is a late-night attempt to get some feelings down on paper a while ago... thought I'd toss it up and see what kind of response it gets. Constructive criticism is appreciated; I'm not much of a poet, so try not to tear into me too badly smile )

“The Way You Are”
Jonathan Bellerive

I find myself in a state of conflict
Vacillating between feelings of loathing and desire
Whenever I think of you

Everything about you makes me think twice
How you tell me to believe what you say
But you don’t want me to see what you do

It’s how you can drop the right line every time
It’s why I hate you and love you so much
It’s why I’ll always fall for you, over and over again

Why are you like this,this line is my only problem. maybe: why must you torment me so wonderfully? instead?
just what i think.
Tormenting me so wonderfully,
Making me beg for agony?

It’s how you are
How you always will be
Why I’ll always fall for you, over and over again

other than that.
good good good stuff.
i liked it.
it was pleasent and easy to read. xd