This is my poem

[goddessofforever]

It's not the greatest, but it has sentimental value, at least give me that.

Title: I'm All Caught Up In You

Your blue eyes and your smile
Have me flying high for miles
My dreams about you stay a while
I'm all caught up in you.

I watch you from not far away
And I think about you day after day
And I wish that I could only say
I'm all caught up in you.

You make me feel like I could fly
And soar among the clouds so high
If only I had the nerve to try
I'm all caught up in you.

You're my friend, how can it be
That my words seem to fail me?
And I wish that you could only see
I'm all caught up in you.

So I ask myself, "Should I tell you?"
And if I did, what would you do
If the words I said were forever true
"I'm so in love with you"?  

[GravePrometheus]

It's good. There's a line or two that I think could use some work(to make the poem flow a little more) but that's just me XD . "Greatest" is an opinion formed by individuals, there's no guidelines for it 8D  

[goddessofforever]

Which lines do you think could use some work beyond the "greatness" one. I was actually thinking about changing that too. I was just at a loss for what else to use. Any suggestions you give me will help a lot.  

[GravePrometheus]

goddessofforever

It's not the greatest, but it has sentimental value, at least give me that.

I was referring to that 8D
Well, the line "If only I had the nerve to try" doesn't really match the rest in my opinion, maybe put "Ride the wind with you until I die"?

The first part/paragraph sounds a little off too. The lines in it don't seem to match eachother very well, but maybe that's what you were going for? I won't make suggestions for those three lines because I think that'd be better left to you.

"Your greatness is like the stars above" could use some work but again, that's not what I was referring to with my first reply lol. Let's see... suggestions for that line are "You make my heart rocket far above"
that's all I have. sweatdrop  

[goddessofforever]

I edited the poem. I took out the whole "greatness" part, and I changed a line otherwise.