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 Posted: Wed May 14, 2008 7:55 pm
I have a friend, ok I must admit it is a bit cliche but I really have a friend who needs the help of the Internet. Apparently, he's known this girl and she's known him for a while, mostly in the friend category from what I can gather, he wants to ask her out but it's a bit awkward so he feels nervous, what should he do in order to either ease the awkwardness or get his courage up? My friend needs your help!
P.S. He does have a Gaia account but I am with-holding it lest he be inundated with PM's.
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Posted: Fri May 16, 2008 10:43 am
I think your friend should talk to her and see what she is like. If he still wants to start a relationship, then he should. But he needs to be careful and rush into it or just say GO OUT WITH ME because that might look bad. So just take it slow and be polite and understanding, and don't worry about asking. She might say no and the two of them can still be friends, or she can say yes.
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Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 12:05 am
Well if he truely likes her and wants to go out with her, then I think he should ask her out. The thing is like the line given to most in this situation goes "the worse thing she can say is no" this isn't exactly fully the truth though. The acual worse thing that can come out of this is.. if he truely likes her and wants to go out with her.... and he doesn't ask her. That is the worse thing that can happen.
If you like someone, care for them, and then do not ask said person to go out. Then this could lead to one of the worst feelings ever, Regret. If he misses his chance with her because he was afraid, then he could regret this for a long time to come and trust me from my experiences I know how much regret hurts.
I think he should work up the courage anyway he can and then ask her. Then once you ask her that statement becomes true the worst thing that can happen is if she says no, but at least he gave it a shot, at least he tried. He will not have to live with the regret of not trying. If he doesn't then he will never know for sure if she would have said yes or no. I for one would rather know she said no than live without knowing if I had a shot with her or not...
Well thats just my 2 cents on the issue. I wish your friend the best of luck.
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Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 7:16 am
If your friend likes this girl, then he should ask her out. Girls (and I am one) aren't usually that scary, and tend to not want to totally crush boys even if they aren't romantically interested in them. They usually won't say go away, or treat you like a cactus or something. It takes guts to ask someone out, and that's respected. It's good I think for boosting confidence too if you can decide to do something like that and follow through
If your friend is really too scared to ask her out outright, he could always ask her to do something open-ended like going out for a movie which can be fun as friends, or as a date, and see how that works out for the both of them.
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Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 1:12 pm
About all I can add onto this is that your friend oughta pace himself. If he's got the time to gradually get closer and closer in, then he should do so. Not only will it allow him to steadily adapt to the situation, but if there's something hidden he didn't know about that'd change the playing field, he may see it before it is too late. I also suggest trying to avoid dithering about whether or not to ask until the last minute, since being time-crunched only makes the nerves worse.
Otherwise, I do agree with what's been said about regret. As I see it, better to have tried and failed than to not have tried at all.
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