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Lavender-the-9-tailed-fox
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Posted: Thu Feb 19, 2009 7:22 pm
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Or...could it be something else??? Here, let me explain. It's been at least a month of these really horrible mood problems. Like, I'll be pissed as hell, yelling, shouting, wanting to hit things (like people, the walls, mirrors, my computer screen, stuff like that), swearing at my friends, calling them bad names when they're trying to help, and just acting totally not like myself...then like, my mood will change later on in the day for no reason, to something else...like I could suddenly get into this really happy, hyper, insane mood where I can't calm down or sit still, and I won't stop talking and laughing and giggling, and completely acting hyper and insane....or sometimes I can be like really really depressed for no reason, and like, think of suicide A LOT.
I don't know what's going on and I can't get myself out of these moods....and these moods are really strong and are having a big affect on my social life because a lot of my friends are freaking out about it and are scared to be near me in case I am in a rage.
A friend of mine whom I haven't seen in a while, was talking to me the other day I told her about it and she said "It's the coming of age for us. It's probably all the hormones..." but I'm not sure if that's what this is...because I KNOW when I am moody from hormones....but it is still possible that it's just hormones. I am really scared that something is bad going to happen so please help me. Should I see a doctor? (I can't let my parents know...they haven't spent much time with me because of work so they don't notice the changes, but they would like think I was insane if I told them, and like...really make me see a lot of doctors and stuff because I already told them I am transsexual and they don't believe me so PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!)
I can't tell my parents. Neither of them will believe me, or just make me go though hell and make me see therapists a HELL of A LOT. Which I can't deal with, because there are times I don't WANT to talk. Actually, I find myself not liking to open up about this, but I need help...I really really do. I've finally realized it...all this time it took me to realize something is wrong. Oh, and I am 14 years old, turning 15 in May. I am mature, and pretty much done all the hormone changes and growth and stuff since I had a growth spurt at like....13 XD
Oh and my school has a councilor, so I've gotten to talk to her once, because my teacher told me to after reading my poem about being stuck in 'the closet' (meaning before I came out and said I was a transsexual) Should I try to talk to her about this???
OH and I *REFUSE* to take medication! I haven't taken any form of medication (whether it be for being sick, or a headache) for like...6 years and I don't plan to start. I can't swallow pills very well in the first place so yeah. Well, yesterday I wanted meds. Like badly. Meds and cookies was on my brain that entire day but I'm over it now.
Yeah....this is long...congrats if you read it all ^^; yeah, this is probably boring...sorry for wasting your time...um there's also a part of me that says nothing is wrong and is screaming at me and saying this is stupid D:
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Posted: Wed Feb 25, 2009 4:37 pm
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Lavender-the-9-tailed-fox
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Posted: Tue Mar 03, 2009 10:05 pm
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 11:57 am
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Lavender-the-9-tailed-fox
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Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2009 11:23 am
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Posted: Sat Apr 04, 2009 2:46 pm
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Lavender-the-9-tailed-fox
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 6:57 pm
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Posted: Tue Apr 14, 2009 10:09 am
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hmmm i'm not gonna patronise you or play it down. I know a lot of people are telling you its hormones etc. But how long have you been having these moods swings?
I know you don't want to go see a doctor and you don't want meds, but i'm trying to be a behavioural psychologists because i went through similair problems a few years ago (i'm 20) and i didn't think it was hormones either. The shouting and swearing and then really insanely happy for no reason doesn't sound like hormones.
I don't want to worry you, but i'd go see a behavioural psychologist, even just once to see what you think. I promise you, they won't try to prescribe you drugs because they don't study medicine. In fact, a behavioural psychologist will teach you coping mechanisms to deal with the moods and suicidal thoughts. Of course, the creed of behavioural psychology is that they help the individual to help themselves, which is essential really, there's far too many people dependant on drugs. Honestly i think its been brought on by the stress of telling your parents that you're transsexual, and that they don't want to talk about it, it might be eating at you subconciously, because even though you say they're accepting it sounds like they're refusing to deal with the real issue.
I don't want to stick anything more on your plate, but i really think it would do you a lot of good, even if you just go a few times to see what you think. Plus a bit of independance will make you feel better, and it means your friends won't have to deal with so much. At least think about it heart
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Lavender-the-9-tailed-fox
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Posted: Tue Apr 14, 2009 3:48 pm
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Posted: Wed May 06, 2009 8:14 am
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Posted: Fri May 15, 2009 6:49 pm
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Posted: Wed May 27, 2009 12:16 pm
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Posted: Thu May 28, 2009 7:39 am
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