how to be a good friend?? anyone??

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

okay i thought i was a good friend, but i guess not...because i don't have a lot of friends, and i'm told many times that i'm not a good friend or if i even know how to be a friend....i talk with my friends, they ask for advice i give them advice....but i don't talk much in a crowd...and because i don't they think i'm not a good friend....am i doing anything wrong or am i just not a good enough friend???  

[Vini-Vidi-Vici]

I dont talk much in a crowd either, unless im making a fool of myself on purpose. If you give good advice, then you'd be a good friend in my book. If people tell you you're not a good friend and you think you are they're probaby the ones who arent good friends...idk, thats just my opinion.  

[V For V]

Well we all think you're pretty cool.  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

really?...cuz i don't know what i'm doing wrong and i keep getting told that i'm not a very good friend....and it's because of this.....my friends tends to get into fights( i get to be in the middle of it all too!) and when i don't pick sides with them, they get mad at me....but i don't want to pick sides because theor both at faults and i don't want to lose them...  

[Seferius Slyferin]

Well, I don't have alot of friend in my real life, I have three actually. So if you think about it, alot of friends doesn't mean that you are a good friend, it just means that lots of people either want to use you or they just can't get enough of your intoxicating personality, usually it's the latter..

Anyways, back to the positive. I don't know what your really like, but it's usually good to stay with one general personality for all your friends. Me, I'm generally calous and blunt, and my friends get that. But when they need help, I'm there no matter what the problem and I'm told I'm a good friend.

What your problem may be is that your friends aren't good. Other than that, maybe you should keep the fighting friends away from eachother.  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

tahnks....now i feel like i'm being used..I mean thanks for your advice..not for me feeling use now....i guess..you're right...maybe i am being used...the times i get lots of calls from them are when they fight....*sigh* now i really suck don't i? Sorry...so much for being a good friend...now i guess i understand why i'm not a good friend...huh? you can't being a good friend to those who aren't really your friends..huh?  

[Seferius Slyferin]

Well, that's the general idea, although I would feel very bad if you went and ditched your friends.
That would be bad, because you'd be alone and sad with no one to talk to, that's not fun to have, trust me. I've pushed everyone away many many times before, and my friends accept that they wont ever really get to know my feelings (that's mostly because we're guys, the whole feelings thing escapes most of them). Actually, now that I think about it...I have alot of life experiance.

Anyways, if you ever need someone to talk to, you can PM me. I might not get to it right away.. I get a little bit of hate mail^-^  

[toyDUCKs]

I know what you feel at the moment. In elementary people were my "friends" because I was smart and knew what to do for homework. However, you shouldn't put yourself down by saying you're not a friend or something like that.

In middle school, for some reason, eeryone wanted to know me. I don't talk much or anything. You should have a friend that respects your personality and opinions. That's why I have one really close friend, she's almost my sister. You aren't a bad friend. I think you just need to find people who will respect you and cherish you as a friend, and not as a wall to cry on.  

[BlackRosesShadow]

last year when i was in the 7th grade 2 of my friend skeepet geting into it a lot and i was always in the middle.....so i know how u feel...but we alll stayed friends mrgreen so cheer up it will get better  

[mildlycrazy13]

I'm always the one in the middle too, I hate picking sides! I'm also usually the one who has to talk to one of my friends for another friend because the two are fighting or something.
I have a lot of friends but really if I think about it many of them are just aquaintances I talk to maybe every two months. I just have a handfull of really close friends. That's probably what you should do too, keep the friends you have now, but find some that care more about who you are as a person, not just because you give good advice.  

[Duchessa]

I am used most of the time sweatdrop but the people who use me are outsiders. My friends are good to me and I try my best to help them and give them advise. Lots of people told me that I am nice, smart and a good friend. You sound like a good friend to me, if only I know you then I'll protect you from people who only use others and can't think for themselves ^^.  

[lady-loveable]

it sounds to me that you are just a little shy.that doesn't make you a bad friend.it sounds like you help your friends out with there problems and thats what friends do.right?if you were a bad friend than you wouldn't help them out.if your friends don't treat you like a real friend or say your a bad friend all the time then you deserve better.look around and see if you have things in common with other people around you.you might want to be a little more open with people and you will make a lot more friends (trust me on this one).even if you don't have a lot of friends its better to have just one good friend that will always be there for you then to have a lot of bad friends.  

[Sotur]

WELL, long a** time afterwards, but here we go: if they r both at fault, u should tell them just that. being a good friend isn't about taking sides, i's about being honest, support when needed [THIS DOES NOT MEAN TAKING SIDES] and stuff like that. taking sides, i believe, means exactly he opposite of being a good friend. bcs u'd b ditching one of them, and that's wrong. not talking in crowds? that doesn't imply not being a good friend, either. it means u just don't like big crowds. so what? i don't like'em either. tho if u want an excuse to use, u can say u r more of a listener than a talker in big crowds. that works for me. i guess that's basically enough it  

[CrimsonxXxSolace]

thanks guys....I like never really came here for a while now...but thanks guys! I'm sorry that i didnt' check this sooner....you guys are all so supportive...LOL..it's the only word i can use...if only i really knew all of you guys! crying .....but there's one probablem..it gets very hard to trust people...after this happens...and well other stuff happens...but i'll try my harddest....and sotur...i'll try to foolow your advice you give to crimsonfang as well...  

[cheerchik]

actually they are the ones that arent being a good friend
if they seriously dont like the way you act, they would tell you what your doing wrong.
just because people say it doenst mean its true.
if a lot of people say it, that a diffrent story.
if a lot of people say "oh your not a good friend" then just ask them what they dont like and try to fix it.
thats what i would do in a situation like that.

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