False smiles

[sorrowscall]

I wrote a poem to pass the time. It came out as this. I think this could possibly be how Ken Felt when he was still evil.

In a sea of happiness,

why is it that everyone seems to smile?

Am I imagining these peoples sadness,

or will I wake up in a white room tommorow.

No, I think their really sad but I don't understand,

how can they smile?

Truth be told,

it scares me to look at these people when they can't even cry,

they won't shed a tear.

they've each lost something dear and yet...

Not one drop of precipatation from their faces,

just twisted smiles that I can't understand yet still see through.  

[Fires Blaze]

Very good. crying  

[Zephyr TruFeld]

wow,that ws definetly unique  

[Ryoumon]

It's strange that you see a world of happiness, and I see a world of emptyness. But I guess everyone sees the world differently.

Awesome poem by the way. It's very good, gives me goosebumps. You paint a beautiful picture with your words.  

[neojoe39]

very good  

[MysticalTortoise]

It's good.  

[Storm Waltz]

I like the line "or will I wake up in the white room tomorrow?"  

[Mint-Mae]

i like it. very good.  

[sorrowscall]

Wow, thanks for the wonderful comments. mrgreen
Anyway, after actually being away from my computer for a while, I noticed it even more than before! Again, thanks for the comments!  

[sorrowscall]

I've written another poem pertaining to false smiles. I don't think it's as good as my first.

These smiles are growing,

their becoming infective!

Why is false cheer,

always this aggressive?

Fear not my sorrowed heart,

for I know my sorrow lives within you.

Yet, my heart has only fake smiles,

to tell it's sorrow to.

Do they really understand?

I can't tell by their smiles,

I don't know if I want to though,

because sorrow grows to anger,

anger grows to rage,

rage grows to something un-named.

Then it turns into,

that dredded fale smile.  

[XxPixidustPockyxX]

Wow these are very good biggrin  

[starlight parade]

Awesome... totally awesome  

[sieg777]

they're a good start. they have a unique, quiet flare. the wording, or word choice could use some working on. word choice can enhance or repress the power of your poems.  

[Dictator Hiyasha]

These are awsome!!  

[Alpine Dragon]

Very nice writing style.