Oh, yea I feel teh sadness of this year already and it's only 4 days into this year.....
Oh well, that's wut happens when ya end one year horribly and start the next on foot and things are already ******** up. crying
Well, other then that I don't really have anything ta talk about yet.....
I feel like I just exist to exist right now.
My life feels like it's on a repeat mode and I'm just not getting any where ya'kno?
But fer some stupid weird reason I still a have a very, very small sliver of hope that things will get better.
But this hope is getting smaller and smaller I can feel it in meh heart. crying
But, I'm glad I can still hope, and tried to keep my head above water.
That's all I feel like I can really do.
If I could voice record and or better yet recod my current life it would be a very, VERY boring, dull, depressing life.
FUll of lots of crying and boring crap.
Geez, I never cried this much in my life and fer this long as well.
I think this is the sadest I've ever been.
I wuzn't this sad even back then when meh mom used to abuse meh.
I least got over it with in a week, and I always had school to turn to help meh and friends.
But now I just myself and teh tv.
I'm lucky I can get on teh computer every now and then but even that's complicated. crying
I hate my life right now cuz it hurts to live. sad
I feel sad all the time and I hate it!!!!!!! >:/(
I love laughing and being happy, I hate being sad, it's just not meh!!!!!!
But I feel like I'm turning into someone else now that I'm out of schoool and on meh own pretty much.
I feel alone and lost....I wish God would talk ta meh but I feel like I abadoned him. :'(
So, why would he talk ta meh if I can't talk ta him right?
Half teh time I can't even forgive mehself for things and meh life. crying
Wow, wut a depressing journal I've written.....
I'm sorry folks I don't mean to rain on yer paraid or nothing but I guess that's all I can really talk about right now is how I feel. sad
I hope yer guys day ish better then mines.
And if so plz tell meh, hearing good news sounds like it'll make meh feel better. 3nodding
Yea, I love positivenessness. xp
Anyways I feel a little better now that I got all that out in writing. 3nodding
So, I will talk to you all sometime when I can!! xd
TTYLZ!!!
~Kitty~
 kyeira chan · Tue Jan 05, 2010 @ 02:12am · 0 Comments |
