Yes, I have just gotten done with watching the last episode of Salior Moon. It was really good. It had my emotions up in a knot for about a week now. Despite that I was glad to watch it because, even though it is kind of a younger persons show, I really love it. It can be really REALLY corny though. I just fast forward through them though. I know I'm weird for still liking it considering that I watched it from around middle school to now. It used to come on about the same time that the bus dropped me off at home from school. I used to wait until the bus had turned the corner than I would run to my house and try to watch it. I also recorded alot of the episoids on tape. That is kind of another story though, That was when I did I would say the worst thing that I have ever done. I took the tapes that had family stuff on it and recorded the episoides over it. I have never felt so bad about something that I have done in all my life. I didn't watch SM for years because of the guilt that I felt. Even though after watching an episoid I would feel so good and inspired that I would go to the piano and just sit there and play pieces that I knew and make up ones that just flowed out. Despite all of that I gave it up. I have not really gotten over what I did, but now, I have finally gotten over some of the guilt from it. That is really the worst thing that I have ever done. I know that it was vicious and mean of me to do it and that is why for all these years I have kept that guilt to punish myself I guess. People always say that I act like a saint and am a goody two shoe. Many have tried over the years to "corrupt me". I guess I just can't deal with the fact that the actions that I take can hurt others. i am always aware of my actions and watch very closely to ensure that nothing I do upsets others. I know that in a way that is destructive. But that is just the way I am. I am trying to change, even if just a little. I hate feeling the way that I do sometimes, as if all the world sins and problems are mine. I put on this armour of indifference and stuck up ness just so that others won't exploit the way that I am. I have been burned many times by people all through my life, and that is the way that I protect myself.
 Jaded Tatersalad · Sun Nov 26, 2006 @ 05:56am · 1 Comments |
