I hate high school. So terribly much. I hate it.
Sorry. You guys seemed like you really liked it, so I tried to not look so.....bleah. But it didn't turn out good in the end.... Well, classes:
Randi-1.
Cam-1.
Valerie-0.
Jordan-0.
DJ-3. If you count lunch. Awesome. Great. Just peachy. Gonna love those classes.
In my homeroom I have Savanna (friend with Kim?), Zach Felau (Yeah, can't spell his last name.....), some new goth/punk girl who's friends with Emily Rose (she told me on the way to the buses), Iven, Vertigo, Farmer, and some other guy with a white dude 'fro. What is it with the high school and grouping people with weird hair in the same homeroom? There's some other girl I don't know the name of, too.
Losing my way didn't frustrate me like others. I didn't mind, since it meant less time with creepies. It was hard finding someone who could point me in the right way, though.
What was hard.............everything? The crowds, the faces I hadn't bothered to learn in middle school. Under all those high ceilings I felt claustrophobic and exposed at the same time. Like with one gust of wind, I'd be blown out. Would anyone care? Would any of those hundreds of bodies walking down the hall care?
Probably not. This place is where you're taught to ignore everything around you. I've figured that out at least, if nothing else. If I flickered out, no one would notice.
I'm sorry. For being pathetic and clingy and pessimistic and dry. It's just how I am. I'm sorry.
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ASK YOURSELF in the most silent hour of your night: must I write? Dig into yourself for a deep answer. And if this answer rings out in assent, if you meet this solemn question with a strong, simple "I must," then build your life in accordance with this necessity..." - Rainer Maria Rilke
When I grow up I want to be
N O T H I N G A T A L L
N O T H I N G A T A L L
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