When I Told Chandler I Liked Him
I never really thought I would like anyone. I’ve always thought I would be the type of girl to just lay back and watch all the heart breaks around her. I guess I was wrong…
The first time I really noticed him was 8th grade but I wasn’t into him… OH his name is Chandler. First day of school, this year, was when I kind of took interest. I would look at him time to time but never spoke to him. Later in the year he got moved to sit in front of me in English. It was ok but one day turned around.
“Hey want to draw on my back?” Chandler asked me.
“What?” I looked at him weird wondering ‘Draw on his back?’ I looked at him and gave him that guilty look.
Chandler turned around in his seat to explain to me what he meant, “You know, take your pencil and trace pictures on my back.” He showed me with his pencil so I understood.
“OH!” I whispered loudly to him like I was a dumb blonde. Ms McCarthy was talking to the class he started to write on his desk, I took notice and leaned forward to see what he was doing. As I’m drawing on his back he guessed what I was drawing, so that’s how that happened. It had got me more interested.
The more Chandler and I did his the more I felt for him. I started talking with my friends Troi and Alisha about Chandler.
“Hey.” I walked up to Troi I asked, “Why are guys so weird?”
“I don’t know, I guess they just are?” she answered confused on why I asked her that. “Why?” she looked at me waiting for a answer.
“Oh, I was just wondering… I like someone…” I trailed off shy and embarrassed.
“Who?” Troi asked me, she didn’t try to pressure it from me so I answered anyway.
“Chandler Gotfried.” I said shyly again I twiddled with the short brown hair I have.
“Oh… that’s cool, does he know you like him?” she asked curious, Troi is not the type of person to butt into other people’s business.
“Well… no.” I looked away and then Troi dropped the subject and Drama class was finally over.
The next day after English was break and I was talking with my friend Jennifer, I walked up to her, we were in Mrs. P’s room getting ready for Drama, it was just Jennifer and I in the room I started to talk about Chandler and right as I said “I think I like Chandler” Chandler walked in when I said his name he heard it and he turned and looked at me confused on why I said his name. I felt my face go bright red I turned and then I ran into a wall which made me even more embarrassed. Chandler walked off when he realized I had nothing to tell him, Jennifer laughed and looked at me.
“He’s gone… that was ironic.” She smiled her innocent smile. Nothing much happened after that we took note in Drama and of course sang in Choir.
As I lay in my bed with a headache from the blood rush to my head and running into the wall from earlier that day I was thinking on how everyone was saying that I should tell Chandler I like him. ‘How do I tell him?’ I thought to myself. I was doing my homework and thinking on how I could tell him, ‘I could tell him straight up in front of everybody.’ That idea didn’t sound good only if I wanted to humiliate myself in front of the whole class, I wasn’t up for that. ‘I could give him a long note explain my feelings…’ that idea was semi ok but that would bore him too much and I would end up still making a full of myself. I lay hitting my head on the wall I was finished with my homework I turned my radio on and listened to my Three Days Grace CD. I was almost asleep I thought about it still, ‘How do I tell him?’ this was harder than I thought. I fell asleep with this topic on mind.
I woke up and got ready for school, I sat on my bed putting my things into my bag I stopped and thought to myself, ‘Why don’t I just give him a note saying “I like you?” that would be ok… and if I doesn’t work I can hide.’ I smiled to myself. Second period came by and I was going to tell him but his friend was right there so I didn’t. The longer the day went the more I questioned my choice, ‘Should I really tell him?’ fourth period I wrote in my journal different reasons why I should and shouldn’t tell him, basically a pro/con list, there were more reason not to so I decided to think through my decision. Fifth period was long and exciting it drove me nuts knowing he was right there and I could tell him I was drawing on his back I decided to confuse him so I wrote on his back, “I like you.” About four times he wrote something I leaned forward.
On his desk he wrote “What?” he obviously didn’t know what I was drawing on his back. I grabbed my pencil and a piece of paper I wrote away telling him I liked him I handed it to him Chandler chuckled and handed it back without replying, my heart stopped I thought I made a mistake
“Why did you laugh?” I wrote on the piece of paper and handed it to him. I watched him as he read it I was anxious on what he was going to say I waited and he tossed it back a few seconds later but to me they felt like hours I read it.
“I don’t know… just wasn’t expecting you to say that.” I didn’t reply I didn’t want this conversation getting any weirder for me so once the school day was over I laid in my bed reading it, now that was over I waited a couple of weeks and asked him out he said no because he was busy, but we talked for a little bit. I’m guessing after his friends found out that when he started not talking to me, I try to talk to him but I feel as I did the biggest mistake of my life.
It’s been a long time since he’s talked to me I’m guessing that because his friends don’t like me, but I didn’t mind for the most part but now as I sit here telling you this story I begin to wonder did I make the biggest mistake of my life? Should I have just not told him anything? Could we be friends right now? I don’t know, my choice was said and done so it is not in the past and I can’t change it. I do wish I can so maybe we could have at least be able to be friends. Yes I still have feeling for him and for he having feelings for me is a mystery I would love to find the answer for but as for now we are just teenager experiencing things that we are not use to, we are changing and we are experimenting new things in our life’s, so as we teens grow through all these new changes many things will be kept as secret or mysteries… I soon to hope to find the answers I need but I will cherish all these years of headaches and heart breaks, as a reward of growing up.
I don’t but I almost regret the months ago of feeling telling, if I could… I would take it all back just so he and I could be friends… Never give up on your gut feeling.
I never really thought I would like anyone. I’ve always thought I would be the type of girl to just lay back and watch all the heart breaks around her. I guess I was wrong…
The first time I really noticed him was 8th grade but I wasn’t into him… OH his name is Chandler. First day of school, this year, was when I kind of took interest. I would look at him time to time but never spoke to him. Later in the year he got moved to sit in front of me in English. It was ok but one day turned around.
“Hey want to draw on my back?” Chandler asked me.
“What?” I looked at him weird wondering ‘Draw on his back?’ I looked at him and gave him that guilty look.
Chandler turned around in his seat to explain to me what he meant, “You know, take your pencil and trace pictures on my back.” He showed me with his pencil so I understood.
“OH!” I whispered loudly to him like I was a dumb blonde. Ms McCarthy was talking to the class he started to write on his desk, I took notice and leaned forward to see what he was doing. As I’m drawing on his back he guessed what I was drawing, so that’s how that happened. It had got me more interested.
The more Chandler and I did his the more I felt for him. I started talking with my friends Troi and Alisha about Chandler.
“Hey.” I walked up to Troi I asked, “Why are guys so weird?”
“I don’t know, I guess they just are?” she answered confused on why I asked her that. “Why?” she looked at me waiting for a answer.
“Oh, I was just wondering… I like someone…” I trailed off shy and embarrassed.
“Who?” Troi asked me, she didn’t try to pressure it from me so I answered anyway.
“Chandler Gotfried.” I said shyly again I twiddled with the short brown hair I have.
“Oh… that’s cool, does he know you like him?” she asked curious, Troi is not the type of person to butt into other people’s business.
“Well… no.” I looked away and then Troi dropped the subject and Drama class was finally over.
The next day after English was break and I was talking with my friend Jennifer, I walked up to her, we were in Mrs. P’s room getting ready for Drama, it was just Jennifer and I in the room I started to talk about Chandler and right as I said “I think I like Chandler” Chandler walked in when I said his name he heard it and he turned and looked at me confused on why I said his name. I felt my face go bright red I turned and then I ran into a wall which made me even more embarrassed. Chandler walked off when he realized I had nothing to tell him, Jennifer laughed and looked at me.
“He’s gone… that was ironic.” She smiled her innocent smile. Nothing much happened after that we took note in Drama and of course sang in Choir.
As I lay in my bed with a headache from the blood rush to my head and running into the wall from earlier that day I was thinking on how everyone was saying that I should tell Chandler I like him. ‘How do I tell him?’ I thought to myself. I was doing my homework and thinking on how I could tell him, ‘I could tell him straight up in front of everybody.’ That idea didn’t sound good only if I wanted to humiliate myself in front of the whole class, I wasn’t up for that. ‘I could give him a long note explain my feelings…’ that idea was semi ok but that would bore him too much and I would end up still making a full of myself. I lay hitting my head on the wall I was finished with my homework I turned my radio on and listened to my Three Days Grace CD. I was almost asleep I thought about it still, ‘How do I tell him?’ this was harder than I thought. I fell asleep with this topic on mind.
I woke up and got ready for school, I sat on my bed putting my things into my bag I stopped and thought to myself, ‘Why don’t I just give him a note saying “I like you?” that would be ok… and if I doesn’t work I can hide.’ I smiled to myself. Second period came by and I was going to tell him but his friend was right there so I didn’t. The longer the day went the more I questioned my choice, ‘Should I really tell him?’ fourth period I wrote in my journal different reasons why I should and shouldn’t tell him, basically a pro/con list, there were more reason not to so I decided to think through my decision. Fifth period was long and exciting it drove me nuts knowing he was right there and I could tell him I was drawing on his back I decided to confuse him so I wrote on his back, “I like you.” About four times he wrote something I leaned forward.
On his desk he wrote “What?” he obviously didn’t know what I was drawing on his back. I grabbed my pencil and a piece of paper I wrote away telling him I liked him I handed it to him Chandler chuckled and handed it back without replying, my heart stopped I thought I made a mistake
“Why did you laugh?” I wrote on the piece of paper and handed it to him. I watched him as he read it I was anxious on what he was going to say I waited and he tossed it back a few seconds later but to me they felt like hours I read it.
“I don’t know… just wasn’t expecting you to say that.” I didn’t reply I didn’t want this conversation getting any weirder for me so once the school day was over I laid in my bed reading it, now that was over I waited a couple of weeks and asked him out he said no because he was busy, but we talked for a little bit. I’m guessing after his friends found out that when he started not talking to me, I try to talk to him but I feel as I did the biggest mistake of my life.
It’s been a long time since he’s talked to me I’m guessing that because his friends don’t like me, but I didn’t mind for the most part but now as I sit here telling you this story I begin to wonder did I make the biggest mistake of my life? Should I have just not told him anything? Could we be friends right now? I don’t know, my choice was said and done so it is not in the past and I can’t change it. I do wish I can so maybe we could have at least be able to be friends. Yes I still have feeling for him and for he having feelings for me is a mystery I would love to find the answer for but as for now we are just teenager experiencing things that we are not use to, we are changing and we are experimenting new things in our life’s, so as we teens grow through all these new changes many things will be kept as secret or mysteries… I soon to hope to find the answers I need but I will cherish all these years of headaches and heart breaks, as a reward of growing up.
I don’t but I almost regret the months ago of feeling telling, if I could… I would take it all back just so he and I could be friends… Never give up on your gut feeling.
