Once upon a time, around last summer, I met a girl named Meg. The meeting was on the internet. I kind of liked her after I got to know her, so I lied to get her to like me, a desperate attempt that could only prove to be disastrous. I knew that, and I took the risk. To her I was Derek, the 16 year old from england. I was really Peter, the emo 13 year old with no chance for love in the outside world. All of my class mates hated me just for being me. As time went on, the relationship grew. I found myself fond of her deeply, until pretty soon, the inevitable happened. I fell in love with her. She was my one. I couldn't stand watching her believing the lie, dating this non existent Derek.
I did the right thing and told her the truth. She took it too well... she forgave me, and I knew I had to let her go. Months went by, I tried to move on, but the love remained for her. I talked to her for the first time in months, only to find out about Tim, the handsome skateboarder who woo'd her in my absence. When that news hit me, my heart ached. I yearned for her love again, and I knew it could never be. I had commited emotional suicide on myself. I knew it all could have been avoided, had I been straight forward with her, and truthful from the start. She was but a year older than me, we could have been toghether happily, to this day, but I ruined it. The love of my life is out with another man because of my foolish incompetence... and I hate myself for it. I have found new love since this, a beautiful girl called Maggie, but the place in my heart for Meg is sealed. No one can replace her in that part of my heart. Till the day I wed, maybe till the day I die, I shall think of her. I shall think of what once was, what could have been. I shall never forget you Megan Gagnon, this is my emotional suicide letter, I shall not die physically, but the love is there and can never be. The girl from New Jersey that I shall remain deep friends with till the end of time, never to be more than that like it was. I love you Meg, and I miss you.
~Peter
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