~Poems~
No I did not write them...
I want to feel his touch;
but I want him to know that I am tough.
I want him to hold me;
but he can't love me.
I think about him all the time;
which to me is not a crime.
I wanna see his smile;
Which stretches for miles.
I wanna kiss his lips;
So soft and warm.
I wanna have him there;
but he would never care.
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Dreams
To sleep I cry myself in tear,
In my sorrow I wallow here,
Without someone to call my own,
I fear I will always be alone.
With cologne I spray my pillowcase,
At night it’s where I rest my face,
The dreams that nightly fill my head,
Make me wish that I were dead.
For in my dreams true love is mine,
In your arms, it’s where I find,
That’s when I wake, my arms are bare,
There’s no such thing in mind nothing is there.
What a dream to have to be,
What teases with my eye to see,
Forget is what I wish you would do
me saying that without a clue.
In my mind is where they remain,
Through my hurt, and through my pain,
So I can go on with my day,
In my thoughts is where dreams stay.
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I've Always Been This Girl
I've always been this girl who runs away
Runs away from everything and everyone
And I don't know why
I guess I am scared to face the answers of reality
Although reality has already hurt me
And it hurt me badly
Leaving me with a broken body
Bruises inside all over
Guess I will never know how it feels to be whole
I've always been this broken girl
Has nobody ever even noticed
What a surprise I'm invisible to the whole world
I've always been this invisible girl
This invisible broken girl who figured out
That crying is sometimes her lullaby that gets her fast to sleep
Has no one ever noticed the look in my eyes
The look of pain and wanting to die
No because everyone just walks the other way
Not paying any attention to me whatsoever
That doesn't bother me anymore
Cause I know that no one else matters
In this fate in time I know that I have me, myself, and I
Because people says the wrong things
And they think I need help
Why do I need help anyways
I swear I'm okay
Nothing I can't handle
Cause I've always been this broken girl
Always been alone and in pain
Has no one ever noticed
So I can handle anything
I'm tougher than what anyone thinks
Cause I've been through more than you'll ever know
The only way I can pour my heart and soul is in my writings
Cause I know no one else will ever understand
They will just say all the wrong things
They say that they are worried
After all everyone that surrounds me as helped this pain
But they will never know cause I know they would deny
I've always been hurting deep inside
This pain has always been there
And its finally turning numb after all these years
So I can handle myself and this pain
I can handle being alone
Cause I've always been the girl who has always been alone
The girl who has always been dying inside
Crying for help but I don't want help anymore
Cause I know everyone won't help me the way I need them too
That's why I don't talk to them
Cause I know I'm better off alone
I've always been this broken girl but no one has never noticed
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Shy Girl
I'm a shy girl
afraid to be confident
afraid to love
and afraid to feel
all of my nightmares
are becoming all too real
the people I relied on
to catch me when I fall
left me here
so I hide behind this wall
I'm scared of what the future brings
but terrified of what it forgets
I'm just a girl
afraid of going it alone
in this big bad world.
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'If I Weren't So Shy'
Oh, if I weren't so shy!
I could look another straight in their eyes.
Not prostrating my chin towards my chest
but lifting my head putting all shyness to rest.
Always walking with my head facing down
never seeing anything but the ground.
Head now raised to feel warmth of sun
My life rid of shyness has now begun.
A feat such as this I MUST explore!
For life could only then give me more!
Taking the pain of my shyness stings
giving me all that this life can bring.
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Being shy
Sometimes being shy is hard
Not knowing what to say
Not even knowing what to do
Through every passing day
Never saying anything when you’re around
A word to say that is easy
Letting it out right and not silly
Making it lovely not cheesy
Thoughts running through my mind
Like an ever-lasting love song
Listening to each passing word
Hoping I don’t make it go wrong
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