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PG.21

It's been a few months...I got emancipated.I got a Pomeranian and I love with my best friend Cassy In Newyork City.I don't think i have the words to explain how i feel everyday.I know there is nothing i can say to that.Actually i havent spoken for 2 months.My heart is locked in a locket.The locket has chains with thorns on it wrapped around it.I have the key.Inside the locket,but most obvious is that i dun think i ever wanna open it again.''Hey what're you doin today?'',Says Jake.Jake can turn a 5 minute story into an hour.He's funny all the time but i dun laugh.It hurts to laugh now.He's 19 and has a condo.He works as a stylist,so sometimes i get free clothing and he takes me shopping daily.I put on my white snow boots and a white tanktop with some white arm warmers and i put my hair up.I looked in the mirror and just stared.I wanna know what love is.I got up and walked out the front door.I forgot the dog.I named him Coco.I got the leash and everything and walked down the streets of Buffalo,New York.I was on my way to this cute cafe when i saw MR.D's ex in it.He was drinking an espresso.I knew i should have walked to a different place so i did.I walked to the park and just watched Coco run around.Coco was the name MR.D told me to call him one time.He said it got him horny.I never did because me and him were having some issues so i named the dog Coco in loving memory of him.I know...Pathetic right?..I don't know where life takes me now but i just wanna see MR.D again.He dosent feel the way i do.He dosent have feelings for me anymore.He just thinks of me as some stalker guy who never got the chance with him i guess.I played Frisbee with that annoying t**t for a really!...really...long time.On my way home I saw his ex again..I turned the other way but the mother loving t**t Coco ran to him.I didn't turn around.I was right.Life Is like a box of chocolates.''Hey!''.The guy called from behind me.''You forgot your dog!''.I kept on going.And going...And going..and....going...

PG.22

As annoying as Jake is he's still my friend.He invited me to this gay club where kids from 16 and older go.And i told him i didn't feel like,but why not.I had nothing else to do.I was in the shower.I rubbed my chest down to my c**k and stroked it as my way of cleaning it.Then i brought my left hand back up with my other hand on my stomach.Something stopped me from moving that i surprisingly didn't notice before.I was still wearing the necklace MR.D gave me.A tear fell from my eye.The only thing i forgot to get rid of was wrapped around my neck.I dared to open it.I saw the picture of me and him at the skating rink.As the memory of what happened that hit me.I got hard.I had to get rid of the necklace.He told me how to take it off,but i forgot he said when i tell him i dun love him anymore he'll take it off for me.Those words scarred my heart.I couldn't take it off.I stared at the picture for,i don't know how long.''Hey Jer i was wondering if...yo...you..''.I didn't notice him there.Then i saw him at the corner of my eye.I didn't really care.I just got out the shower,turned it off,and walked past him.''i...''.He said still facing the bathroom.I put on a of the shoulder skinny black sweater.With a pink tanktop under it.I wore my black skinny jeans.The butt pockets were cut out and there were holes in the knees which was pretty sexy to me so i wore it.I curled my hair.And put on my eyeliner.Jake came behind me.He looked so cute,but i didn't say anything.''I'm sorry about..what happened''.He said blushing and looking at me through the mirror.For the first time in 2 months.I spoke.''It's ok.'',I say walking away from the mirror and on my way to the car.He stood there speechless with his mouth opened.Even i was surprised the way i sounded.I talked alittle like i didn't give a flying ******** about everything..''You spoke...You finally spoke'' He said smiling at me.''Yeeeea..i did''I say giggling and feeling the low cut side of my hair.I'm not sure why i cut the sides low.I think it was just a way of me starting over.''Wow i love what you've done with your hair''.He said feeling the sides too.''Don't touch my head'',I say laughing and moving his hand playfully.He laughed and we were on our way to the club.

PG.23

The club had the sign for gay people.Y'know.the one with the circle and then the pointy arrows.I got out the car and walked right in.''Wait!'',said jake behind me.''You have to be careful,Jer'',He says getting infront of me.if it was so damn dangerous why the hell did you bring me here smart a**...When i walked in there were hot guys everywhere.Shirtless,Cowboys,Police officers,Firefighters,Drag queens,Bunnies,Leather.And even naked guys.I couldn't find anyone my age.It was so funny.I was hard as ******** though so that was one thing I needed to keep closed inside my head.I found me and Jake a table and I sat down in it.I was wondering where he was when i heard a few guys call me jailbait while dancing.They gave me a signal to go over there.I shook my head.''C'mon we don't bite!'' Yelled one of the hot dancing older guys.Jake sat down finally across from me.''Are you having a good time?'' He asked laughing.''Yea'' I said giggling.The gu7ys that called me jailbait came over and to where me and jake were sitting.''Yay boys wanna dance with some jakeeeeh'' He said doing a tiny dance.''Hey.do you wanna dance with us?''.One of them asked.''Sure''.Said Jake and he went off.All 5 boys danced on him.I think some of them were trying to give him a dance floor orgy more than dance with him...Oh my mother ******** god.To make this day worst.Guess who i saw with his shirt off...Mr.Ex.That is what im gonna call him.He spotted me.Damn.''You don't have to go anywhere.I didn't know that was you at the park.I just wanna say im sorry for what happened.Me and MR.D arent seeing eachother anymore.He dosent want anything to do with me after what happened.Anyway i put your dog in the car.I saw jake and he told me where the car was.Im moving tomorrow so sadly this is the last time you'll see me.Sadly?...I'm more than happy''O.k''.Before i could get up He stopped me and looked at my chest.''What?''.''You....You still have the locket.I blushed red and looks away.''Yea..What's it to you?''.I say almost tearing up.''MR.D has the same one.He never took it off no matter what''.Says Mr.Ex.''You better hold on to that'' He says starting to walk away in the crowd of horny homos.I sat down and remembered the good times with MR.D..Especially the night he fingered me.for hours...After that night.I walked home alone because Jake said he was gonna go have some fun with those guys at there place.I told him i didn't mind going home alone.Why is it so hard to say goodbye....

PG.24

When i walked out the shower this morning I heard there was this convention and everyone at the cafe talked about this really cute guy they said was gonna be hosting it.I hated conventions,but i know that Jake is inlove with them.I forgot im not wearing anything but a thong and a robe,but who cares it's Friday morning and I am too lazy to put something on.''Jake'' I say coming down stairs.''You should really put something on you sexy beast'' he says laughing playfully.''Shut up!'' i say laughing with him and sitting at the table.An hour later i put on a gold T s**t with gold arm warmers that also form into fingerless gloves and a pear of skinny jeans.I put my hair up in a pony tail and made sure i had to side bangs coming down my face.I dun know why i always say what im wearing lol even i get tired of myself lol.Jake was honking that horn.I wanted to annoy him for being ok with me walking home last night.I finally decided to come to the car.''What the hell jerry.What..the..hell'' He says staring at me.I look at him and gave him the ''i didn't do anything position''.''what?'' I say almost giggling...When we got there.There fan girls Everywhere.I mean there were dozens.It was crazy.The funny thing was there was more boys then girls.Again i couldn't find Jake because he purposely left me to go do something stupid.I spent to hours waiting for the thing to be over,but that was not happening until night,so i decided to go to the car.As i was on my way i heard a voice.''Hey everybody!'' Says the voice.''Welcome to the NYC Convention!'' He says.Could it be?.Could that be who I think it is?.''My name is Dominic and it is time to partaaaaaay!''.Tears immediately fell to my cheeks from my eyes.Everyone was screaming and jumping up and down chanting ''NYC''.I just worked my way out of there.But before i left i wanted to get a good look at him.I dared to turn around.He had on a had on this barbarian costume.He looked so sexy.I looked in those dark blue eyes.I wanted it to be the last time..''Who's gonna come up here and get the best costume award!?''.He yelled.I turned around.Moved my hair out of my face and kept walking.He sounded like he had his life together.Like everything was ok.I didn't want to ruin that.''Who ever is trying to leave and we mean anyone.Your a** will be up here in a sec.Believe it!'' He screamed into the mic knowing the crowd would would go wild with excitement.''Don't miss the Masquerade party tonight everyone.It's free for the LGBTQ's.And it's like stripper kind of so look sexy and see who wins!''.He yelled.I could have sworn i heard girls being taken off stage.''Hey you!''.The spot light was next to me pointing at some guy in a police outfit.He looked 20.The guy could hardly believe.He screamed and jumped up and down.I kept on walking and i accidently bumped someone.''No.Not you officer.I'm talking to you goldy!''.I bent over to pick up my stuff holding my hair.When all the sudden i noticed there was spot light on me and my a**.Oh and of all things happening everyone could see my new thong.I stood up straight.''You with the long hair and the gold on!.Come here.now.'' He said in that soft sexy voice.Everyone went wild they moaned screamed and some people took off their clothes.To make things worst everyone started chanting ''Go Goldy!''I moved my hair out of my face and looks down.Istill had tears in my eyes.''He dosent seem to hear me.I guess that means face to face huh everyone?!'' He says into the mic.Making everyone go even more crazy.''Someone block goldy for me will ya?'' He said stepping off stage on his way to me.F***ety S**T F**K!.I mean really?! are you ******** kidding me?!The guy infront of me was a stripper.I pushed him out of my way and kept walking,but alittle faster Some really big guy looking like he was on steroids stood in my way.''Um..Excuse me sir but i ould like you to get the hell out of my face....well your boner out of my face too please'' I say not showing my face.''Can't do that''.I didn't want to do this.But the b***h wouldn't move and his boner smelt like he already wanked in the crowd.I sighed and kicked him in the nuts.Everyone screamed laughing and thought it was getting more exciting.I thought it was because i kicked him in the dignity,buuuut...no.He seemed to be almost there.I started running.I was at the door.''Don't let em go!''.Why the hell is he only chasing me? am i really the only ''goldy'' trying to leave or anyone else dammit.These Japanese girls and one gay Japanese guy got in my way.They were saying something but i couldn't remember.''What?!'' I yell at them moving my hair out of my face.''Im sorry but i have to go!'' i yell more.The Japanese Guy came up to me and said into my ear.''ai anata wo ma~tsu te!''.He then backed up and everyone got quiet and stared at me.What the hell were they looking at.The Japanese guy fainted.I had no time he was gonna get to me.When i took one step someone had a strong grip on my arm and turned me around.I quickly looked down with my hair blowing in the wind.He stood there.And just looked at me.''Lift up your head goldy''.He said.I shook my head.''Who wants to see goldy!?'' He yelled.everyone chanted ''yes''.He lifted my head up the way he did when he was about to kiss me.I turned away.My hair blew in the wind.Alittle bit of my eye showed.When he was about to do it again a siren went off.And balloons and everything went off.He looked up laughed and started to dance away.Nobody noticed but i was crying so hard.The way he touched me...Brought back so many memories...

PG.25

I walked home in tears.Everything was sooo coming to a point where i wish what had happened had not happened tongue twistaaa.MR.D.He looked so sexy and with his chest showing and that beautiful smile.I couldn't take it.One thing is for sure.He looked as if he were over me.Like we never happened.Like everything was ok.If he's done with me,he's done with me.I guess i have to just cope with that.Why keep the locket anymore..It's not like there's any hope.I reached for my neck to take off the locket when something horrible happened.It wasn't on my neck!.''Ugh.Holy mother ******** said punching the wall,but not doing much to it.I knew what I had to do.I had to go back and get The locket.Not because i wanted to.It was because if MR.D saw that he'd know i lived here now and to see he was smiling at the convention I wanted to keep that on his face,so I had to get it before he did.Because i didn't want what just happened to happen again I decided I'd go when the masquerade party starts,then he wont see my face.On my way back home you could see people in there cars driving by with things on their car from the convention about MR.D.Some of them said ''DOMINIC"S HOT'' some of them say ''HEY SEXY''.I agreed very much with those posters.I wasn't worrying about Jake.He was probably off ''having fun'' again....I groaned long and hard like i had a hang over and it wasn't because i knew what i had to do.I wore a thong with golden chains on my arms and a golden chain choker.I was a expensive sex slave and.The key was in my heart.wink...wink.I wore my hair in a pony tail with a tiny hump on the top.''Are you coming Jake!?''.I say giggling knowing he'll be a smart a**.''Hey im comin don't get your nuts in a knot.He was a Neko...When we got there I was annoyed with my hair in the back so i let it down.People already started playing naughty with Jake while i sat back and watched.When i was walking past everyone there were guys winking at me.Some guys hugged me,gave meh some love,But trust me on this one.Those who gave alittle tooooo much love got some TOUCH love from me just to be even.I saw MR.D.He was a pirate.except he wore black speedos,black opened pirate fluffy shirt,and the pirate hat with the eye patch.The thing that really touched me the most..was that He was wearing his locket.I really wanted to ride his pirate ship right there and not give a damn who was looking.I knew what i came there for so there was no reason wasting time doing so.I got on all 4's BENDOVA!.Sorry.Funny moment,but anyway people were stepping on my hair so i had to put it back the way i had it.This guy infront of me had these boots i could have sworn i saw MR.D wearing with his p....oh...''What're you doing on the floor goldy?'' He says getting down to my level.I blushed and looked away.''uuuh...heh...Just..y'know looking for something that i lost'',I say getting up.''.I dusted off my legs.''Whoa.You...look like someone i know.And i mean exactly like him'' He says looking in the back of me.I blushes red and looked down.''Is that your real hair?'' He asked feeling my extensions.''Oh..um..no.It's extensions.'' I say letting some of it cover my right eye.''You know you dun need extensions to look beautiful.You can be yourself''.He says smiling.I nodded and blushed.''Lets go sit down'' He says holding my hand and pulling me somewhere through the horny fan crazed homos.I wasn't gonna stop.I mean seriously you could see the best view from behind him.Let me tell YOU!.he has a nice a**!.When we got there he sat across from me and smiled.I blushed and kept looking down again.''I'm sorry,but you keep reminding me of someone i was close to'' he says laughing alittle.''Oh really?'' I say with a tiny smirk.''Yea.Really'' He says.You would never have guessed he would be here i mean seriously the guy is eve....uuuuh.....is..is it raining?.I looked at MR.D.He was letting the water fall on his hot viewed chest.You could see my boner through my thong.''You looks pretty in the rain!'' He shouts so i can hear.I blushed with a tiny smile,but then while i was sooooo busy looking down i spotted what i came here for.The locket was under his foot.''Are you ok?'' He asked watching me glare at what he thought was his foot.''huh?!-oh!.I'm sorry.i have to get something on the floor.''Oh let me help you with that.I didn't hear him while i was on the floor,but the next thing you know his head bumped mine and my mask fell off.As worst as things already were..He ever spotted the locket.''j...Jer...I..''.I immediately started crying.He could see the tear down my left cheek.''You know i didn't mean to.''..''Just..''.I didn't even finish the sentence i was on my out of there ''wait''.Says MR.D holding to my arm.I shook him off and ran...He opened it while i as already half way down the street in tears.''The skating rink..'' He says to himself holding the locket to his chest.....I'm sorry i ruined the night.Im sorry you will no longer smile knowing im here.Im sorry....

PG.27

MR.D slept over that night,but not in my room.He slept in the guest room.I'm not sure how close I wanted to be to him anymore.A singer said that true love was a gift.It really is.I just wish i got that gift longer before i lost it..I stepped into the shower this morning.thinking about the good times we had and how i wished we could have those moments again.MR.D does not have time for me though.I am a complete waste of his time.''I should just..back off,but then again that whole time hug was so precious to me.Later on that day he sat down and explained to me he still had feelings for me but me and him wouldn't work out just yet.''Are you saying that we wont be like we use to anymore?''.i say looking down on the other side of the couch hugging a pillow.''No..Im saying only time will tell,now give me a hug''.he says opening his arms and laughing.i had no problem being his friend.Even if I still was inlove with him.I hugged and snuggles the sexy son of a betch and layed my head on his chest.''Wanna watch some QAF?''He asks randomly.''Where's the remote'',I asked.We both looked at the other side of the couch.''Last person to turn it on looses?'' He asks.i accept your challenge you sir sexy lot!.''Bring it on betch!''.i jumped for the remote when he pulled me back in doggy style position.Then,he jumped on me i got onto his back and he got me off,but my little a** got back on.I made sure he flipped me to the front this time.I was infront almost there!.When he flipped me around and crawled over me ob his way to the remote.I would have moved but it was like a dreamy slide show in slow motion.First his eyes,then his chest,stomach,....I think you know what else.I got a boner so fast,i think it rubbed against his front.One thing is for sure.my bulge got bigger when his front came towards my face.i kind of moaned.i even did the dumbest thing and opened my mouth like i was about to deep him.it took me a while to notice this,but he was staring at me.''oh heeey''.I blushed red.''Are you ok?''.he asked.i nodded.''Can you come here please?'' I asked like I was in pain.''oh,sure''.He came over.And the second he got close enough i pounced up and was in the lead.The remote fell to the floor so that's where I was heading.''oh no you don't'' Says MR.D pouncing ontop of me.''Holy cheese gritz!'' I yell laughing and being sat on.He got off and went to the floor.he crawled with the remote in his hand,but he was NOT.I repeat NOT getting away with that.i jumped on him and it was the riding horse position.He lifted up on his knees and made me fall off.I crawled infront of him and I had the remote in my hand.I pointed it at the T.V,but MR.D came out of nowhere like some shadow and knocked the remote across the living room floor.''noooooo!'' i yelled laughing.He crawled over there fast and got the remote but i threw a ball at it and it flew at his hand and back near me so i crawled toward it,and so did he.i got it first.BEAT THAT!!!.MR.D did what he knew could get him to win.He came over to me.i thought he'd stop infront of me,but he kept making me bend back while i was up on my knees.then i was layed down on the floor.''You're not getting the remote'',i say giggling but blushing.I stroked my cheek and kissed me gently.I was in paradise like the first time he kissed me...he took the remote and turned it to QAF on Logo channel.I got up and walked to walked to my room.I had only one tear on my cheek.I did because i knew it wasn't because he loved me that he kissed me like that.It was only for the game...I hate that I love you.

PG.29