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I'm tired, in that sort of I have no energy but there's little chance of actually sleeping sort of way. Drained of energy. Nor is it the good, I've used my energy productively and am feeling accomplished type of tired. I haven't the energy to do much of anything today.

I will force myself to take care of some things that need doing. Including my least favorite household task. This may, or may not, help me feel better.

Dinner is going to be something that I found myself craving. Which may, or may not, help me feel better.

I think the source of the problem is, as TGISW likes to say, all in my head. Or, to put it in a better way, the problem is part of my mental health issues. It would be nice if I was able to find something that would help. When I was seeing someone it didn't help, and it wasn't not helping in the way where it was making things worse so that they would get better later. Which is what I think needs to happen, and this scares me. I'm on and off suicidal as it is, how much of the getting worse before it gets better can I survive?