I don't want to be such a jealous person.. I mean..... I don't know if I can trust you with Amanda.. And now.. so many people... I get sad, and upset.. Because I don't have that. I can't have the fun you have yet.. But I get to hear about it... And so many people that are going to want you.. And so many people you will want. Parties, clubs, gatherings.. So much I won't be a part of.. What all could happen then.. I am stupid, but I can't help it.. I am so worried. I mean.. You already don't know if you love me anymore.. I am nothing to you. But.. I just hurt.. There is nothing for me here, or anywhere... And I know it, and you know it. I just miss you.. The way we can be.. The love we seemed to have. But, it must have always in a way seemed to be nothing for you. Well, with the things that happened.. It was nothing.. how am I not crying.. how am I not screaming.... Why am I even bothering.. Because I know I love you. Because I know I need you. I love you so much, it hurts.. it hurts more than I can stand.. But, I mean... I can't help it. I want to stay with you...
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