I'm about to go out again, but I figured I should write this. I...I have a bad feeling. One that shakes me down to my bones...and settles within my soul. Something very bad is going to happen today. I can only hope Kisuke isn't involved...because that would only crush me. I've been thinking of things...and I know for a fact that I won't be able to stay in New York. Kisuke...no matter what happens...I'll always come back to you and you alone. I don't belong to anyone, regardless of what Sora-sama says. We juunishi are still human beings and I think we should be able to make our own decisions. It's not fair to us...having to hide our animal selves...and being forced to choose between the pain of loneliness...or the pain of knowing that the one you love was hurt because of your affections. Before, I didn't want anyone to see my journal. My thoughts...my feelings...my emotions. But now, I do. So, if anything should happen to me...anything that would prevent me from telling Kisuke how I really feel...how much he means to me...and how I feel like I'll die if he were to leave me...I would like for him to have this journal along with Haru-san's and Isuzu-san's. These are perhaps my most cherished posessions...and I only hope that they will find him. I'm going to go now, I hear the Author's Pen (my favorite cafe...) has a special on muffins and hot chocolate...but maybe...I'm in the mood for some fruity ice cream...
~Izu
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::.Kindle.My.Heart.With.Sweet.Nothings.::
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