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Savvy Dea's Journal
Eh...nothing much maybe some poetry or fanfiction I am writing. Place where I can write down my thoughts.
Losing Myself (Rontonu's Diary Entry 3)
For sometime now I have not been well. I swore I would never mention what I am about to write in this entry, but it seems my "lack of control" had been discovered.

As I mentioned once before I was cursed when I was younger. I had died of a terrible disease that spread through my village when I was about eight years of age.

Unwilling to accept my death my father, chief of my people, sought religious sources to bring me back from the void.

My kind the, Black Flame Kitsunes, appose all gods. It was forbidden by our govern laws to never seek any form of contact to the gods of Spartan.

All the gods that stood over Spartan were demi gods that took the throne after ridding of their father, Zavior. His children were cruel and like to torture those that inhabited Spartan. It's one of the main reasons why my people rebelled against them.

To bring me back my father made a deal with Zavior. Zavior agreed to retirn my life but for a price. I would become his host and allow him rebirth into the body of my first child...Raves...

I was cursed with his mark. I became Zavior's puppet after my life was renewed. The years Zavior spent thriving in my body took a devastating toll on my strength.

The god was able to live within my mind but he needed much more then that. My species requires a special flame to exists, our Dire Flame, the source of life. Without our inner flame we wouldn't be able to live.

This flame is located in a small jewel bounded to our foreheads. The jewel is also a focus that strengthens the Dire Flame. Zavior seem to have feed on my Dire flame through the years weakening me as a person.

After my marriage end with Ryu, I was told by a soothsayer that I would lose myself over a small course of time. The process has already began.

Shortly I will die mentally. In other words my body will remain alive without my soul. I can't explain it any further then what I already have.

There are times that I am not myself and I inflict extreme pain on myself. Two days ago while I was out hunting I collapsed.

When I awoke I discovered I had ripped out my own left eye. No one noticed such a difference because I hid it so well behind a dark mask.

Its only a matter of time before I am no longer the person I was born to be. My strength has withered, been robbed from me...I have none left to help me with my will to live.






User Comments: [2] [add]
Airashii_Enjuku
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Mon Jan 01, 2007 @ 11:14pm
HELL WILL FREEZE OVER BEFORE I LET YOU GO!!! mad


commentCommented on: Thu Jan 04, 2007 @ 03:56am
I won't let him have your life! Id die before then...No way he'll take your flame, It'd be a cold day in hell before I just let anyone take away my love.... stressed



Nataro
Community Member
User Comments: [2] [add]
 
 
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