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Mysti mentioned something about Heather's friend being worried. I was curious, I wanted to know. So I went and read her blog on myspace. Now I wish I hadn't. I haven't spoken to Heather in months. Haven't really liked her in months either. Felt she was two-faced. But it doesn't matter. I always worry about people I know. Mostly those I am close to. I want nothing more than to make everyone ok and keep them out of harm. It's stupid. Half the time I can't even keep myself out of harm. I'm only 17. I am pretty much useless. But, nonetheless, curiousity got the best of me. And now I am so worried. Heather used to be a really good friend. And now this girl is worried about her and I don't know why. But,it makes me worry. Who cares we don't talk? Who cares people say she talks a lot of crap. I still worry. I would worry about my worst enemy if something was wrong. I am just too FREAKING NICE. I hate it. So much. And she called today. Three times. Heather did. But I avoided her calls. Because, I didn't want to talk. Usually she will only call once and if I am not around or she can't talk long she will say she will call back later. She never does. She called back twice. Why didn't I answer? Why was I so cruel? Shouldn't I have thought it strange she called more than once? Maybe for once she wanted to talk. Like we used to? Or am I overdoing things? Am I reading too much into things? Letting my emotions get the best of me? I don't know! And itis driving me insane. Someone please give me the answers...I am so confused. I just hope she calls tomorrow. I will talk to her. I will. I just want her to call back now...I think I am going to cry now. I think I am really close to throwing up. Mainly from getting so Bhfkdelfagbka. I do this to myself too much. Worry and think until it makes me sick. I am such an idiot.

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