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With everyone saying that same thing, I'm kind of freaking out. Am I really that controlling to you all?

She really does hate me. I don't know what I did.I had kind of hoped she would miss me a little but I guess it's out of the question.

I don't want to be like my seniors but I don't want to be what they all say. I'm dying. Maybe I've been dead this whole time and I never knew it.

It doesn't make sense to me. I wish I were dead. Andrea and Christy never have ever had a problem with me. We've been friends since I was in kindergarden. How can I be the darkness that they accuse me?

I don't get it. Everyone talks crap about me and those that do love me say nothing. How am I ever to tell my enemies apart from friends then? How can I trust people? How will I ever love?

I will never get my wish come true at this rate. Maybe I was destined for misfortune and breif moments of exstacy. My death will one day be burning bright and then out like a light. I don't want that. Being forgotten is painful.

I've never been able to trully forget people. Even now if you ask me all the people I've hurt I can name them each off, or my old classmates, and even strangers that I've had moments with. Everything is destined to haunt me it seems.

I'm sorry for overwhelming you with all this. I know you have enough to deal with right now.