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Like every day, I went to the coffee shop today, and it wasn't that bad, though I have been depressed most of the night, I'm finally in a state to where.. I'm not completely overcome with sadness.. Concentrating is still a bit hard, and I've still not felt happiness, but I was able to actually laugh for the first time in I don't know how long... I'm still missing the one I love like hell, and It still feels like there's a hole in my chest.. But I'm at least kind of calm.. I'm not completely excited about it, but its good I can still sometimes feel okay, and not depressed... I just wish the depression wouldn't come back..

I'm still feeling frozen in time though.. My will to move forward is minimal, but I still wish to make it to another day, another month another year... I'm going to continue to dream of when I can meet the one I've given my love to, and for her, I'm going to live that long too.. Because this dream, I'm still living... Without it I would feel I wouldn't have a future.. No past... I still don't believe I've been able to make anyone happy, nor do I believe I'm useful to anyone right now... I'll continue to try though, if I can..

(always keep moving forward, if not for yourself then for someone else, Never believe life should revolve around yourself, but for the people you can make life worth living for. Be nice to others, and respect your elders, you never know when you might lose them. One foot in front of the other, one more step, one more budge one more small inch, you'll make it to where you want to go soon enough, just keep pushing forward, never lose that will)