To my parents, I can't do anything right. I can't eat, because everything I eat is unhealthy or I eat too much or some other problem. Of course, I can't not eat either... That's not healthy. My dad wants to take away my computer because I spend too much time online. He'd rather I do anything else, even draw or stare at the walls. He says at least drawing would make it so I was developing my art skills. When I try to show him stuff I've been working on with digital art, he says that's not worth it because I'm doing it as stupid projects with my friends and stuff. What does he think I'd be doing if I was hand drawing? I'd do the same kind of stuff, so what's the difference? He says I need to get a job when that's what I've been trying to do. He tells me I need to follow up, but he never said that before... Am I supposed to think of everything? Am I supposed to be perfect? He says no yet he expects me to do and think of everything without any help. He wants me to be happy with my life, yet he doesn't let me decide what I want to do with it. He just wants me to go back to my old plan when I'm not sure that'd really make me happy anymore. He calls all my friends worthless, when he hasn't even met some of them. And now he hates the one friend he liked because talking to her made me question what I wanted. He says she's a bad influence because she's doing bad in school, but at least she's trying to change that. He thinks she's a bad person because she has a lot of dreams and is giving me ideas and dreams too... Is it that bad to have a lot of dreams? My mom has a lot of dreams, he doesn't hate her for it. On top of all that, he expects my room to get clean... A reasonable expectation if it weren't for all the others. Yet he doesn't even talk to me about it or try to work something out... He wants everything his way. My mom wants everything her way, he doesn't mind that. But when I want things my way, he says I'm selfish. I can't take this! He wonders why I'm so confused... He causes a lot of it!
 Virginia Poe · Mon May 31, 2010 @ 09:55pm · 0 Comments |
