Lately I've had absolutely no motivation to go forward... in all aspects of live and living.
But I'm over that today. I got a good cry out. I got a huge burden off of my chest: my relationships.
When I think of my friends, the most important thing that they give me is a sense of security. Andrea would drive more than 1000 miles in a single night if I needed her and she's actually threatened such before. For some reason I also think of Jordan when I think of this clause. It's like we share the same interests or many similar interests and talking to her comes so easily. It's like she's so interesting that I don't ever need to worry about trying in our relationship. And of course there's my brother who makes my home really "home" to me. I feel safe near him and knowing that he is close. Knowing that he is alive gives me hope that I can live. I can live if he can live because he is so amazing. I need to impress him but it's not necessary in his eyes; therefore, there's no real pressure there just an aspiration or dream... Thank you. <3
I cried a lot.
I cried hard.
Lol. It set me straight again. I felt... refreshed. It was as though I had vines tangled in my tires so I couldn't drive straight. Instead I sputtered and coughed smoke. With the vines freed from my spokes, I can speed away. I can petal as fast as my heart would feel in the moment. I can ride again.
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Fragmented Self who wanders through life like a dreamer and wades through the river of dreams as though it were the only truth left in this world