a wave of fear just swept over me
I realized how, how fast everything is coming forward and how far away I feel from everyone else. I... I want to tell myself that I won't live for very long but it scares me. I'm scared.
I'm backing into my corner and want to lie down in my bed. But, when I do, no one will be able to help me. It will be just me...
I used to be so in control of everything and now that I'm in the weaker spot. Since I've been the weaker one, the one who depends on the ones she's given support, I... I don't know how to handle it. Instead of telling them I need them, I cower into a corner.
When I do tell them... they tell me how worried they are and how it's so hard to support me. They can't tell without me telling them. Half the time... I feel like, half the time I can tell even when they don't tell me. >.> Like, recently. Only, I don't want to help. u__u sad but, I really don't want to help anymore. I... want to be the weaker one. I want to learn how to handle this. There's gotta be someone or something I can do
I'm absorbing too much. I can feel my mind expanding too far right now. It hurts a little. That may be my problem... maybe I've taken in too much today - lust, creativity, support, superior, caring, and then nyan factor. All are strong points. u___u Maybe I can sleep it off?
Feh, I'm scared...
what if I have a bad dream? T___T
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Fragmented Self who wanders through life like a dreamer and wades through the river of dreams as though it were the only truth left in this world
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