I'm kinda hyped up so I don't know how much sense this will make. I've been reading porn for a while now, prolly an hour, and my mind is like numbing out. Some... really good new ones.
Oh Roku, I blame you for this.
The end of this week, it's Christy's 21st Birthday. I'm going over her house. Sounds fun.
Friday Dev and her friends are meeting for a picnic... I might go since I've got the time and I like to bake.
I don't know whether to think I'm stupid or evil for taking interest in the guy I've been talking to. At first it was like nice to have attention and affection from that kind of guy. I can't quite explain it right... he's the kind type. He's kinda sensitive while being logical and practical. I don't understand him a lot of the time and he's quite a mystery. Whatever. I just, hope that I know better than to allow myself to get any closer. I let my heart go so easily. I shouldn't do that. I mean, he's cute but it's online. It's an online fling. How can you know who he really is? Another Ryan, I don't want.
Haven't been sketching. Still makes me a little sad. Instead I brainstorm and talk to friends to express self.
Expression is everything. It proves you are. That you feel. And that there is something worthy in you. Expression is everything to me. When it's blocked, all hell breaks loose.
My head is literally spinning now and I have to pause while writing to see and know what I am typing from fear of falling. Porn, affects me differently at times. I need to sleep it off... Night.
View User's Journal
Fragmented Self who wanders through life like a dreamer and wades through the river of dreams as though it were the only truth left in this world
 |
